Love And Relationships

How to Get Rid of Boyfriends

Calling your boyfriend and saying “we’re breaking up” would probably be the simplest way to end a relationship. Your special circumstances warrant a unique approach, so here are indirect ways to drive him off without gathering the courage or mental courage to take direct action. This is the sure-fire way to rid of your man.

1. Ask impossible questions.

The point is to trap the guy into digging his own grave. You want to ask a question at the worst possible time; you should do this during dinner, while you’re driving, or while you’re cuddling.

Note that cuddling on the couch or in bed are both acceptable times to corner him. Ask the question innocently and prepare to be either hurt or offended. The setup is brilliant because he can’t worm his way out of it—even avoiding the answer makes it look like he has a nasty opinion to hide from you.

You can try to ask him if you look fat in a certain outfit; you don’t need to be wearing it, but it helps if you are. Smart ones will probably answer in the negative, so be sure to accuse those ones of a) answering too quickly or b) answering too slowly. The implication behind both is that they’re hiding the truth from you. Alternatively, you can just ask him if he would stay in the relationship even if you became pregnant with another man’s child. Even a hypothetical question like that will scare him off.

2. Get territorial.

Jealousy is a beautiful thing if it’s used properly. It drives away men like few other things in this world. Don’t let him see other people at all—neither friends nor family. Treat him like your own piece of property. It doesn’t matter if you’re a good person under normal circumstances; just go with it to get rid of the boyfriend for now!

Don’t give him time for social calls, especially if that involves girls who aren’t you. There’s always some sort of chemistry between men and women even under the most polite circumstances. They could be out to get him; while they can have him once you’ve rid yourself of the guy, you need to act like he’s your property until he leaves.

3. Become a stage-5 clinger.

Constantly badger him over text, social media, and with phone calls. Don’t let him have more than an hour or an hour and a half to himself. Send him ‘good morning texts’ and act hurt when he doesn’t respond immediately. Also consider demanding a gushy emoticon in the response, but get a feel for his mood first.

Treat his family like your own after an inappropriately short amount of time. Using the family like a security blanket goes a long way toward making the guy feel uncomfortable. He doesn’t want to babysit you, but he still wants to cash in on the benefits of dating. Make him second-guess the trade-off between intimacy and your perceived lack of emotional independence. He’ll do some soul-searching and, with any luck, decide that it just won’t work out.

Alternatively, constantly trying to be too inappropriately mushy will make him uncomfortable. This works especially well in public, and in cramped public spaces, such as busses. Constantly try to strike a Hollywood moment by staring longingly into his eyes when it’s difficult for him to hold your gaze. Hold it for far longer than anyone should.

4. Communicate dysfunctionally.

Frustrate him with your unclear or absent communication! This works well together with ‘becoming territorial’ and asking the ‘impossible question.’ Capitalize on your momentum by failing to tell him what went wrong. He’ll pick up on the fact that it’s his fault in some way, but the value of this approach stems from the benefit of whatever conclusion that he draws. He will either believe that he’s screwed things up too badly to continue, or he’ll believe that you’re unreasonable.

Wedging apart the two of you can be much easier than you think! You can also give him the cold shoulder instead of explaining what he did wrong.

5. Spy on him.

Look at his private messages. Look through his phone when he’s in the bathroom, read his emails if he ever leaves his computer open, and look through his call history. Don’t even worry about leaving things the way that you found them; you want him to think that you’ve been looking through his stuff. You’re here to get rid of your boyfriend, so you might as well anger him to top off the cake with a cherry!

6. Cancel plans repeatedly.

Nobody likes being stood up. Cancel your plans at the last minute or simply forget about them altogether. It doesn’t matter which one you choose because you aren’t going to meet him anyway. Do this between 4 and 8 times until he gets the message. Remember to act offended if he accuses you of being at fault.

The best tactic to drive him even further away usually involves conveying your own victimization through guilt. Say, “I don’t want to feel guilty anymore,” and watch his face change with a wide range of expressions. He won’t even know how to respond!

7. Blame him for unreasonable things.

Specifically, give him a hard time for things outside of his control. This doesn’t need to turn into a scenario in which the man cheats on you in your dream, but you can still take out your anger on him in subtler ways. You can direct anger toward him if your first choice of restaurant or movie theatre is full.

Get mad at him for things outside of his control. Perhaps his friend offended your friend at some point, or someone’s pet threw up on the expensive rug while both of you were at work for the entire day? It doesn’t matter; just get angry with him for it.

Watch terrible TV if you’re ever in doubt. Jersey Shore, Maury, Jerry Springer, and daytime soap operas will all drive him away. It works especially well in an apartment because you can’t really escape the TV in such a small space. Try watching intelligent shows if he actually likes the horrible stuff; The West Wing, Game of Thrones, The Sopranos, or any BBC murder mystery should do the trick.

That’s how to get rid of a boyfriend. If all of that fails, then you can also just call him to tell him that it’s over, of course. But if you don’t think that will work, these suggestions should get you on the right track.

About the author

Nicole Harding

128 Comments

  • Okay im so glad that im the first to leave a tip cause let me tell you my story…I met my current boyfriend when I was 12 started going out on my 13th birthday and we have been going out ever since. I 16 going on 17 and he is 2 yrs older than me and has way more experience than me because ofcourse he is older than me. These 3yrs we have been going out has been hell. It was all good at first but TRUST me when I say this the longer you stay with that person the more it will be hard to let go. And that is the thing that I really love this guy but he treats me like sh** so the main thing I wanna say is for all those females that are barley starting a relationship and think it might last for a long time then I strongly advice that when you see the first sign of jealousy or lien and cheating then PLEEEEEEEEEZZZ brake up with him!!! He is not worth your pain and suffering before it gets any more serious because you do not wanna end up like me stuck in a relationship where there is nothing but fights and arguments all day every day. Put it this way its all good in the beginning but in time all of that WILL go away I promice you that. I might be young but ive seen and done things I will always regret so just do it for yourselves K!…yUH!!!!

  • Though this is not the best way to get rid of a long term boyfriend, the best way to get rid of someone whom you have been dating, is to say “I often get really, really mad after sex”. If they don’t leave after this, then you know they are seriously messed up.

  • i dont have any tips..instead, i really need help. my boyfriend is really jealous and he has cheated on me at least once. i broke up with him before and he wouldnt leave me alone. i really need some advice to break up with this jerk…

  • To Rachelle’s posting: I think ANY boyfriend who cheats on you is grounds for dumping. Do you want to waste more time with a jerk?

    One thing that I did once when I was in the military, and in my early 20’s was, completely ignore this guy who wanted to marry me… I turned off my phone. I eventually moved and got a new number. I think when my old mobile/cellphone shut off, the he was still calling my number and leaving messages! So as long as you don’t return his freaky text messages, shun all of his friends and don’t mail him letters, you’ll be fine.

  • call him, and say “babe i’m sorry it just isnt working…we had fun but now i think its time we both move on and…well you know see other people”

    =]

  • My advise as a Man is, unless he beats you or has affairs, be honest with him, and tell him the reason, done well you’ll have a friend for life, or at least he will move on. Men are stupid, you avoid us and we’ll think it’s PMS, if you ignore us, we’ll think we made a mistake and will still want to clarify that with you. And if you care about your reputation and his feelings, if you meet someone better, first leave your boyfriend and then set a date and be happy :-). If the new guy likes you he’ll wait for the breakup and you can wait to.

  • oh my gosh i thought i was the only one suffering all this but now i got people who are on my position.
    oh well i cant really give any of yous any ideas because my own life is messed up, instead i wana know some more ideas to get rid of the “EX” . Now my story goes something like this: you people out there might take it as a joke but no kidding this guy from canada, i met him online like 2 and a half yrs ago, we were friends first and then he decided to fake it and said ok we will pretend to be gf and bf and i said ok yeah fine, but later on we got serious and decided that we will meet one day, yep eventually we were in love ( on net) and then he started giving me all these hard times, you know how we used to talk on the phone every day even for 5 minutes, but now he wouldnt do that, he would call me after 2 days or 3 days and send me emails like one email in a weeek, and i just got confused and thought that he might be having an affair with someone there and thats the reason hes ignoring me. he kept on doing it for like one whole month, oh well, then i met this new guy here in australia (where i live) and i found him really sweet and caring, and i started liking him but now that i’m gone so into this new guy, we’ve physically done things that lovers do, now my ex boyfriend wants to come back and be a part of my life as he used to, but i am so affraid to tell him this.
    i dont know what to do, he said he might be visitng australia to check why i’m not the same person as i used to be, and now i have got no clue about this. if anyone can tell me anything that would solve my probelm i will thank that person so deeeply, its killing me everyday, and its making me scare cuz of the fact that he will be here soon. Thankz folkz but i really need your help!!!

  • Response to Mechelle: Bottomline, you and your on-line friend were friends at some point so be honest about your feelings and don’t tell him that the two of you will stay in contact. Be happy with your new boyfriend. Tell him the truth…the on-line relationship wasn’t working for you and I need someone to hold you rather then a smily face. It (things in general) get worse before they get better. But getting over the worse will happen when you tell the EX the truth. No, he probably won’t take it well but you are being honest and you can’t help the way you feel. Good luck to you. Someone once told me that life is too short, you have a right to enjoy your life and be happy.

  • im looking for a tip or advice to help get rid of my bully boyfriend he drags me down smashes my house and scares me with his threats.. he dont live with me but wont stop comming round my house all hours banging on my door and shouting abuse throught the letter box.. what can i do?? if i go to the police would they contact social services because i have children?? either way i just cant win?? many thanks for readin this.. xxx

  • to rachel’s post…get a restraining order. move house if you can. this guy will only get increasingly violent in time and you AND your children are at serious risk for injury. no joke, sweetie. he sounds like true-blue, wife-beater material. don’t play with this guy.

  • I have been going out with my boyfriend off and on for 4 years and the last three years have been hell….He cheated on me and then I went back out with him(big mistake)…I thought I was in love and it would change…then he broke up with me and didn’t give me a reason…after two weeks I started seeing other people and then he saw me happy and wanted to just hang out as friends so we hung out and then we started dating again…after a year he broke up with me and again didn’t give me a reason why he was breaking up with me that night I saw him talking with this girl and didn’t think anything of it..the next day he was with her again and they were dating…I was so upset I thought that there wasn’t any reason for living..then I met this awsome guy and he was so nice but again my boyfriend just wanted to hang out and again we started dating…I am still with him today but I am not happy as I used to be…I know that eveyone one that reads this probably thinks I am stupid …but he won’t let me break up with him he finds me wherever I am at…I just told this story so that if your relationship starts out like that get rid of them while you still can……

  • Response to Stephanie – This old cheating boyfriend has you were he wants you. He comes and goes (in and out of your life)as he please and has cheated in the past. He breaks up with you for no reason and then you see him with another girl. He is playing mind games. And he will keep doing it as long as you keep putting up with it. If it were REAL love he WOULD NOT treat you this way. He is walking all over you…by taking him back you allow it to keep happening. Drop him and don’t look back, thank your heavenly angels that you didn’t marry the man.

    Response to Rachel – Listen to Julia’s advice. Do what you can to keep that man away from you and your kids. If he is acting this way now; it will only get worse. You have to do what you can to get away from this man.

  • just slip out the back,Jack
    make a new plan,Stan
    don’t need to be coy,Roy
    just listen to me
    hop on the bus,Gus
    don’t need to discuss much
    just drop off the key,Lee
    and get yourself free.

  • I have been in a relationship for 2yrs. now and my boyfriend which I love dearly and with all my heart moved in 1yr ago due to a job loss. He doesn’t work, he says he looks for work but nobody calls him. He did have a job a few months ago, but he was tardy and did not show up sometimes. My parents hate him because he doesn’t provide for us. He took my car one night and hit a house and fled the scene. He doesn’t help with the housekeeping, nor meals. My family has said they have seen him around with another girl, but he swears he is only talking to her as she is a friend of a friend. I love him so much. Why can’t anyone understand this. He has no where to go, nor does he have a job. We are both over 21 yrs. old. We both like to party and have fun. I know I probably should listed to my parents but like I said I love him. Can you help!!??

  • Liz, you need help; help with what? Your above statement says that you want people to understand that your man could be cheating, has no job, hit a home and ran, he doesn’t clean and makes no meals…!!! Then why do you love him? What does he do that is so wonderful? My man would never act that way and the reason I know this is because I wouldn’t put myself in your situation. There is nothing wrong with having fun and enjoying life but part of life is taking care of the people you love and taking care of your responsibilities…does your man take care of you? No, you answered that yourself. He is living off you; your money, your love for him. If you had no job would he be working, cleaning & cooking for you? Why would he if he doesn’t do it know. He is home (has no job from your above statement), that would give him plenty of time to clean something and cook a meal but he chooses not too. Sorry to be rude but you are blinded by the love you have for him.

  • Leave tampons (used) everywhere. Sure it’s disgusting, but it’s worth it!

    Tell him that his brothers penis is larger than his.

    Refuse to “swallow”.

    Tell him that you have a “GIRLfriend.”

    Gain 100 pounds! After he leaves, immediately loose the weight and start dating his best friend.

    Tell him, “I wish you were bigger.”

    At his annual christmas party, take his boss into the coat room. Later, emerge from the room looking disheveled, remember to turn your panties inside out. Later, change for bed in front of him. If he doesn’t notice the panties, express shock and say, “How did these get inside out?”

    Clean out his bank account and tell him that you spent it all at Madam Repunzel’s palm reading. Explain that Madam R tells you that a big change is coming in your life. When he leaves, yell out the door, “See…Madam Repunzel was right!”

  • hey im like SOO glad after knowing im not the only one with these kinda prob..well i have a bf (long-distance rlationship) we’ve been dating for 1 year and 3 months..everything seemed right untill he started boasting about his achievemnts and compared himself with me in almost everything i did!!i’ll be having my major exams this year and it almost seems like i can’t get him out of my head.i tried breaking up with him twice but the guilt of hurting him just got me to get back together again.what’s worse is that his family thinks im somewhat after him. i’m a girl tat x care about physical appearance( my bf has a calf mouth) but recently he went on telling me that i’ve been putting on weight which is a little true but i wud’ve really prefer it if he didn’t tell that infront of all his friends!!my frens thinks im dubm because they certainly think i deserve someone much better than this but i just can’t get myself to break up with him again..HELP!!!

  • Give him crabs.

    Amputate your leg and refuse to get a prostetic.

    Sell all his tools.

    Drain the oil from his car and take it on a shopping spree (with his money). You get extra Jedi points if you’ve already sold his tools.

    Tell him that you want a big family (at least 10).

    Shave your head.

    Tell him that you “accidently” killed your old bf. Then ask him if he wants to go for a walk in the woods.

    Watch Sex in the City CONSTANTLY!

    cry and moan.

  • My boyfriend broke up with his longterm girlfreind to be with me. we have been going out for 6 months. he says that it was a controling relationship and that he loves me so much it hurts. he used to have job untill an accident and has been waiting on the claim for two years and has been depressed because of it. now he is with me he is trying to get a job and sort himslef out but I still feel that he is like a child wanting mothering. he is living with his father that he was astranged from. I have to admit I care for him but he annoys the crap out of me, especaily if we are together for more than 48 hours. he is like a puppt dog always wanting attention. when he comes down for the weekend first of all I am happy to see him but by the end I want to slit his throat. also my freinds and family dont like him very much and has noticed that I have gone down hill. being with him stresses me out but I just can not make him see what it is doing. he so badly wants to make things work, but he just seem to not go about it the right way. I’ve treid talking to him and everytime I tell him the things his ex has said about him (not good, but not sure to believe her because she twists things) and all my feras etc he finds away to make me feel sorry for me. I do care about him and maybe if he was more of a man I could love him. but I dont. how do I get oyt of this one to stay friends but for me to get out of it? please. I do love him in a way (and the sex is good) but he makes me miserable.

  • umm all of us got different probz but the same topic and we r just listing down our problems no one is helping anyone out man!!! m so frustrated 🙁

  • My friend needs help. Her mom started dating this guy,one of our best friend’s mom’s ex,and they broke up,now the guy goes between the best friends parents and i often feel like the middle man, and i can only image how they each feel!My first friend,the one that needs help can’t stand the guy, because he’s a real jerk. He’s controlling and doesn’t take no for an answer, he comes into their house and makes a bunch of new rules, attempting to just plain out take over the house. Her mom says she is going to kick the guy out, but in the end she lets him win and doesn’t do it. The friend has talked to her mom about it,and talked her into it at times,but it never works in the end. The friend and her little sister both hate the guy and have both tired everything they could to get the guy out. When he is there, neither girl is allowed to hang around friends because they aren’t “Christian” enough for him.My friend’s current boyfriend isn’t even allowed to spend the night because they had sex,which her mom knew about before he came into their house, this is the 3rd time he has been in the house, what can she do to get him out???

  • your all crazy putting yourselves in horrible situations like these, none of you have any confidence at all, and you seem to actually think you can change these guys, girls their own Mother’s couldn’t change them! I say….think again and do something for yourself that makes you feel good to gain your confidence back once you all have that back you can continue to soar and make him eat your dust!!!!!! Oh yah and toughen up my god all this ” I dont want to hurt him” waa waa waa get over it, or you might as well sign your life away (in blood) to the devil! For real people!

  • I have to disagree with Amanda.
    It seems easy and simple to say and think about doing these things, but when you are actually in the situation (whether your bf is clingy or abusive) it takes a lot of nerve to stand up for yourself and say to him “listen, I don’t think we should go out anymore”
    But if you are going to breakup with him, be straight forward, tell him in person and give him a reason why. ie: ‘we always argue, We have nothing to say to each other anymore, I’m not ready for a serious relationship… etc

  • hey i am so what in the same condition, i have been dating this guy for almost a year and start from the ffirst 2 mths i have been trying to get out of this realtionship he is so needy need too much attention and most recently he lost his job and is getting on my nerves about every little and big things i swear i have tried to be supportive in every way i can but since the day we started going out almost months every weekend we meet we have to fight at the end of the night then we kiss have sex and go to sleep forget it till the next week we meet what do u think the problem is
    i really don’t want to date but i am afraid he will kill me or do something to me i want help in anyway for now suggestions

  • start hitting him for no reason

    go to his bathroom and leave poop in the toliet, or a tampon..ewww

    eat something that gives you horrible gas before a date and burp and fart as much as possible

    everytime he starts talking about another girl, ask if he’s cheating

    dont brush ur teeth or wear deoderant

    tell him everything about him that bugs u

    ask if he likes sleeping with other guys

  • Michelle,

    I am assuming you are young and do not know the game as of yet…Let me fill you in and it will change the way you look at men and relationships! First off a long distance internet relationship is not a relationship by a mans standards. Most men that carry on with these types of relationships for a period of time get off on having a woman waiting on them, keep in mind that for your one “fling” he is having 10 and at leaste one of them he is telling her she is his one and only. Men who prowl the internet and develop relationships thousands of miles away are usually playing a game and need alot of attention from women RUN!!! Second, the game goes like this you never let a man know that he has you especially if he isn’t giving you proper attention (i.e. daily phone calls and/or emails, texts, initiating plans to see you, and giving compliments and showing affection). Now I understand in your case with the distance this was not all exactly possible and that precicely is why you do NOT get into these kind of relationships. On one hand you are protected from being used physically because of the distance but on the other hand your heart can be used and abused and this is far more violating than sex, trust me. Now back to never letting a man know he has you, this is an absolute must in the dating game. You owe this man no explination because he has done nothing for you! One day a man will come along marry you and place you in his palace as his queen. You will bear his children and the fairy tale will begin. You and your king will share the joy of creating life and sharing your lives together….but guess what….even then you must never let him know the sun rises and sets on him or beleive it or not you will kill the love he looks at you with. Keep it challenging with this guy if you want to turn around what you once had but my suggestion is to flee the INTERNET LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP because it can be exhausting in an emotional way. Hope this helps you make better choices in love and life….God bless!

  • response to bianca:
    i know what u mean- i am a guy, but my boyfriend is the same way. i completely agree with u on what u have said. i have only been with him 9 months, but the longer i wait, the harder it is to break up with him. im not sure how to do it, but i know i need to. i love him with all my heart but i hate the way he treats me… and u dont understand what that means unless u really have been in love…

  • I have been with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. He has cheated on me with one of my friends and i broke up with him. i started seeing other people but he came back and made me feel like i was the one doing the wrong thing because i moved on so fast. We started talking again and it got really good but now he is starting to get into drugs and emotionally abuse me. I love him but i dont see a future. i want to get out before it gets any worse but i dont know how because i know he would make my life a living hell. Any advice? Im 17 and we go to the same school and he is very popular and he really can make my life miserable if he wanted so im scared! HELP!!!

  • I can tell you what works from a guys stand point.. I did not read all the posts but this will work while showering miss the important parts…Make sure he sees some really crusty undergarments a couple times a week.. Top that off with being more intrested in getting oral sex and he should depart in less than a month… If not YOU need to start having someone else pick your mates… Thanks 4 reading

    :”) LiVe aND LoVe EVERy DAY 4 THaT DAY WilL NEvEr Be Again!!!

  • I NEED SOME SERIOUS ADVICE…

    I have been seeing this guy for 4 years now. We have one 8 month old, and another on the way. Though he has never been physically abusive towards me, he mentally torments me. He has been married before, and reminds me everyday…par example, tonight I TOOK HIM OUT for a $100 dinner. He brought up the fact that HIS wedding dinner was $200 per plate. He makes me feel like crap just like that ALL the time. But he’s very cunning about how he does this to me, so that I’m not instantly affected. He promised me a year and a half ago that he was going to make my life a living hell…since then, he has gotten me pregnant, stolen over $600 from me, LEFT ME FOR FOUR MONTHS JUST AFTER OUR SON WAS BORN, went on a drug bing for that whole time, cheated on me WITH A GUY, forced me into a hotel room with an old pervert, called childrens aid and had my son taken from my custody, and got me pregnant again. He also continuously uses me for money. I am scared to leave him because I KNOW he’s going to tell the police, childrens aid, and others lies about me, so I’ll either lose my son entirely, have me watched 24/7, or worse, have continuous problems throughout my life.(which may happen anyways because he IS the father of my children, I may never be able to fully get rid of him.) I don’t know how to leave this man, and don’t see any future for myself and soon to be 2 children without this man making our lives hell. If ANYONE, has advice, PLEASE leave it here so I can at least have some sort of hope. Thanks.

  • I’m a girl that needs serious help with my clingy boyfriend. I’m also the type of girl that doesn’t like to hurt other people’s feelings. Anyways, I’ve been dating this guy about…two and a half months now. We fell for each other fast, so he asked me to marry me. I felt like it was right, so…I said yes. Okay, so everything was good between us for a while until he started driving me crazy. One day, I was talking to him on the phone, and the phone got overwhelmed with static and I couldn’t hear a word he was saying so I hung up. Later when I talked to him again he was like: “Whanh-whahn-whanh. You hung up before I got to say I love you.” He drives me so freaking crazy. He reminds me of how girls act towards their boyfriends. Anyways, eventually, I thought to myself, “Oh my God, this is not the type of guy I want to spend the rest of my life with.” I told him that I don’t wanna be engaged anymore, but he posted this blog on myspace saying that he was never going to let me go and that we’re going to be together forever. It really creeps me out. I really wanna break up with him, but I don’t want to break his heart because he said that he had never really loved a girl like he loves me. Somebody! What should I do?

  • To Sweet3xbaby:

    If I were you, honey, I would go to the police and tell them your story. You need to get a restaining order on him, and have HIM watched 24/7. He’s obviously psycho and you don’t need a man like that to help raise your kids. You need to go out there and find someone that will truely love you and take care of you and your kids. I hope everything will work out for you, darling.

  • advice: never be too nice to a boy that obviously likes u. ends up with him getting the wrong impression and when u finally break it to him it leaves him heartbroken!
    i feel like a b**** but no matter what i say he wont pick up the hint.
    worst of all i sorta cheated- over msn. yeah how tacky?
    i feel like a whore. i shud be shot :'(

  • Although I simpathize with you girls I have to say that nobody is doing these things to you without your consent. Take some responsibility for the situation please. Start with a little. Who agreed to go out with him in the first place? Did you take the time to check out who he really is? You find a way out and do it. As a guy I wouldn’t respect you until you went ahead and left the guy and decided Never to see him again “as friends” or any other way. The anti scoial personality can not change because he/she doesn’t conceive there is anything wrong with him. He keeps saying its you and you beleive him! Get Real. Get out of there somehow and hang out with real friends for a change.

    I tell you it’s VERY frustrating for nice guy’s like me who actually have ethics and responsibilty to see nice girls choose these guys and stay with them. Hello!

  • Well, you dont want a guy to give you a bad rep if you are trying to get rid of him and succeed, so do this:

    Dont call.

    When he does call, tell him ur friend Tyler’s on the other line.

    Hang out with your girl friends more than him, and your family. (Not boys, he’ll say you’re a slut)

    If its a short term relationship, start talking about your marrige (brides maids, best man, dress, etc.)

    otherwise tell him you have NO IDEA who you’ll get married to, and if he says “me?” just have and awkward silence, dont laugh.

    Dont do anything gross, he might spread it, hurt your chances of dating other guys.

    Dont do anything slutty. Same thing.

  • heyyyyyy

    yeah i agree wid KA lol yes release the methane and burrp like a earthquake that will scare him away in one second lol

    geeta

  • I, like god knows how many other people, have a problem.
    I met this guy online and we started chatting… ALOT. Now in the beginning, it was all cool, but now I’m afraid he’s getting way too attached to me. We’ve been chatting for over a year now, and we joke around alot, but I’ve never given him any hints that I like him as more than a friend.
    Now, the second I log on to messenger, he’s there, wanting to chat. I’ve refused to speak to him on the phone because I have a strict policy about people I meet online (yeah, I know I sound neurotic), but I did give him my number, for smses and stuff. Now if I don’t come online for a few hours, he messages me asking why. Whenever I have to go somewhere, he has to know where, what time and with who (I don’t always tell him, but he just keeps pursuing the topic). He’s even found some of my friends on one of those online sites and started chatting with them too… about me. This makes me really uncomfortable.
    Now I’m going to a college in a different city, but he’s determined to keep messaging me and sending me mails. The worst part is that he has my address. I’m getting paranoid that he’s going to show up somewhere to meet me, and I really don’t want that. I’m hoping like hell to cut all contact with him, but he’s not the type to give up easily.
    Sorry to sound like an agonizing teen, but any tips would be appreciated.

  • This one is for MARY:
    It sounds like the guy you are talking to is a very controlling person. Now Im sure that he has probably said nice things to you and you are attracted to him (in a friendship way). But the truth is that you have two things to go by: his words, and his actions. his words are nice to you, but his actions are not. You have to remember that unless you are married to the guy, you have absolutely NO COMMITTMENT to him at all. You are not required by any social rule/law/code that he deserves to be monopolizing your time. What he gets is truly only what you give him. Have confidence in yourself first and foremost, because you are both individuals and remember that you have rights too. You have the right to live your life and bring whoever you want close to you. If you don’t want him to be close to you anymore, you have the right to make it so. YOU have NO obligation to him to keep him close to you, especially if he is harrasing you like that. You said that he constantly tries to contact you. But you also have the right to ignore his attempts. It may be hard, because you may feel that you are hurting his feelings, but right now how YOU FEEL is more important. We women are always expected to consider everyone elses feelings before our own, to our own detriment. Do NOT let this be the case. I believe in fact that he is contacting you repeatedly because he believes that you will cave in and talk to him. Don’t give him that assurance. Tell him you moved and don’t give him the new address, and CUT HIM OFF NO matter what, don’t cave in… He hasn’t gotten physical contact with you so this case is easier than those who actually have seen the man physically. I mean, we are talking about your LIFE here.

    This advice goes out to everyone else on this list too. I have noticed that a lot of the women here are describing situations that they feel trapped in. Please remember ladies that as these men have their freedom of choice, YOU also have the same equal freedom of choice. In fact, the law of the land actually supports the women more than the men (the law is on YOUR SIDE). For example, child support, custody battles (usually the woman wins), alimony, order of restraint and protection, etc. Use this to your advantage!

    Just my POV. hope it helps.

  • I’m so amazed at how you girls get yourselves into these situations! If someone isn’t right for you, don’t get involved with them – or get out quick, don’t leave it too late – problems will only compound and fester.

    Here’s a bit of perspective from a guy.

    The most important thing when breaking up with a guy is to just tell it straight, don’t play these damn mind games – you don’t need to give subtle hints, just do the deed.

    That being said, I know that guys (even nice ones like me) are idiots. You can’t just sneak up on us with things like this, life isn’t often so carefree and everyone tends to be blind to some things. If you just say it out of the blue and expect that your man knew it was coming you’re probably in for a long drawn out break-up. I would recommend asking for a bit of space, a few days – with no contact. After this, then you should do it – if he hasn’t clued in during those few days that it was coming then he is one of those really stupid guys and there’s nothing more you could’ve really done to prepare him.

    Now, it’s in our nature to want to know `why?`! Of course you don’t HAVE to give a reason, but to be honest it’s a bit rude not to, and psychologically it helps us if you give a reason. Otherwise we sit around confused as hell, wallowing in self pity. If you really don’t want to hurt us, do this! But don’t make up something, try to make it something truthful – that being said, try not to make it something that we may think we can change about ourselves – we’re idiots we’ll try to bargain with you and get back in.

    Next, don’t take him back! No matter how much he cries, no matter how much he begs… once he’s gone that’s the end of it! If he gave you a reason once, then he’ll do it again.

    Girls always come to me for advice, it’s something about me – I just give off this `I’m the advice guy` vibe somehow. Probably the most common question, after `does he like me?` is – `can I change him?`. Now as with most things in life it isn’t so black and white. Why do women always want to change us? Women like to say we can’t change, which is ridiculous. A man can change, but only as much as he wants to. However – you have no right to ask us to change! The ability for a person to make his or her own decisions is the only real freedom that we as individuals genuinely possess – trying to force us to change is a violation of this freedom, it may as well be a war crime. Of course you have to draw a distinction between change, and training. I wouldn’t consider trying to get your man to put the milk away after he uses it `changing` as much as trying to make him monogamous. Which leads me to my next point.

    If a guy is cheating on you or has cheated on you – end it, walk away. You shouldn’t have any problems breaking up with him – he cheated, the end. Don’t take him back, he doesn’t love you – you don’t even have to be nice to him, he’s a jerk he doesn’t deserve your love anyway. Seriously girls, don’t kid yourself.

    If your man is abusive, don’t take that crap – stand up for yourself. Now depending on your situation, physically standing up for yourself may not be an option as it may make it worse at the time. But I mean more in the sense of going to the police, friends, family, his friends even! Help IS available, you just have to stand up for yourself enough to ask for it! Please don’t let any sort of abuse continue, if you are genuinely afraid and he won’t leave you alone JUST ASK FOR HELP!

    Relationships are about trust, sharing, love. Everything has to be equal, you shouldn’t be carrying the relationship yourself – the earlier to you realise that your relationship just isn’t going to make it, cut your losses – you’ll save both of you the heartache and you won’t waste valuable time in which you could be looking for someone more compatible. Don’t just settle for someone.

    If you rush into a relationship then you’re only going to end up in misery. Make sure your reasons are valid. Learn everything about the person you are interested in, take your time – if they don’t hang around long enough for you to be comfortable it won’t fizzle out in a few months, or for you to know that they aren’t abusive, controlling or possessive – they weren’t who you’re waiting for, move on.

    Above all else, be open and honest ladies – use your intuition, otherwise you’re as bad as us when it comes to what part of our anatomy is making the decisions.

  • Thanks JoJo.
    I haven’t given him my new address though he keeps asking for it. I’m just trying to gradually cut off all contact with him.

    And to Mick, yeah, we girls get ourselves into an uncomfortably large number of stupid situations, mostly due to our own mistakes, but by the time we realize it, well… we’re kinda stuck.
    Hence we come to sites like this :p

  • Okay..I need some help. Me and this guy had started talking about three months ago and after a while i realized i didnt want a relationship….so thats what i told him but he tells me that i do but im just scared? Its really annoying and no matter what i try to tell him..he just does not listen..i want to be his friend but he said that he cant be just friends with me. i know for a fact that he likes me way more than i like him. i have no idea what to do…i really dont want to hurt him..SOMEONE HELP PLEASE!

  • This is not a tip its about my boyfriend we have been together for 3 years and it has been like a roller coaster it was all fine and dandy the first 3 months then he got really controlling i couldn’t hangout with my friends or do that much of anything without him wondering then things started getting better we had a long talk and we had trust for each other i hangout with certain friends that he likes they usually come over to his house for parties and stuff but i just recently found out i was pregnant i am 5 months and the past 4 months all he has been doing is hanging out with his friends they are always over the house and they never go home i tell him i just wanna spend time alone with u and he still never tells them to leave he says we can spend time together still when people are over what does it matter his one friend has become a real problem i don’t hate him but he is always around everyday my boyfriend comes home from work there he is right over at his house my boyfriend thinks im a phyco but isen’t he callin the kettle black when he doesnt want me to hangout with certain friends but he can hangout with everyone he wants and when i say anything i get screamed at he says he is just having his fun before the baby comes but i want his to shape up and start acting like a family he is very happy about me having his baby boy but why r his friends so important right now they never were before like this i just think its stange i don’t understand it i am suppose to be moving in with him in 3 weeks and his stupid friend got kicked outta his apartment and is staying with him until august 1st i just can’t deal with it this kid needs to be gone by the time i move in i just want to be a family i feel like nobody understands this except my parents my boyfriend just makes me feel really alone and miserable latley he should be more comforating and suppotive i have his baby in me when am i ever gunna get my own way~!

  • I need advice. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years now. He’s my firstserious boyfriend, he is 29 and I’m 21. We’ve been living together for over two years. I love him, and he isa really good person, but he’s got a temper. He hasn’t hit me, but he has shaken me and threaten me, called me HORRIBLE names and insulñted me when he gets pissed. I know I might provoked some of this things but I don’t think I deserved to be insulted or scared like that.
    We haven’t had much sex lately, in fact we do it like once every two weeks and it sucks, I do it just because he wants to (he doesn’t force me or push me to it, I just do it to please him). He gets mad and won’t talk to me like four times a day and we are constantly arguing. He has no job, and he doesn’t seem to mind when I don’t have money to buy food sometimes, because I support the whole house myself. He does some cleaning but it takes him two days to do a day’s dishes and the kitchen is constantly dirty. Plus that’s all he does I have to do all the other chores. He also never wants to hear of something bad that happenned to me or if I had a bad day at work because he says I’m negative and upset him, so I have to swallow all my feeling and I have noone else to talk to. I go to therapy but I’m embarrased to even tell my therapist about this, I don’t know why. I’ve tried to kick him out but he makes me feel guilty like I’m leaving him on the street and i have no feelings and he ends up being really sweet and I let him stay. He says he loves me and I believe him, but in one point I think he is just used to me and doesn’t want to be alone. I don’t know if I want to be without him anyway.

  • I had a girlfriend that cheated on me, and then broke up with me.
    Not all that bad. We both knew why, and we just hugged and said goodbye in the park.
    It was beautiful. Yes, girls be honest. Even when rejecting someone.
    A girl lying to you hurts more than telling the truth.

  • I need some help cause I accually think I’m the one going crazy but when I play it all out in my head something tells me I’m right. I have been with my boyfriend on and off for 10 yrs. I love him to bits and want him in my life but there is some problems. He has cheated on me and I the same, this seems to be a hard part to get over. In the last year I have been trying to trust him but I found out he is addicted to crack cocaine, he never does it near me and sometimes he won’t even come home. I have found girls Phone numbers on his cel phone, but I’m to scared to ruin this by adding another arguement, he says they are friends. He tells me I’m crazy and I’m ruining everything cause I always argue with him. He’s never home except at night and he leaves after he wakes up. I know he talks bad about me behind my back. He never does anything with me he won’t even kiss or hug me anymore.I work a lot and raise 2 teenagers on my own. please someone give me some insight on what to do I am having a hard time letting go and I know it is best for me to do so.

  • I dont have a tip, but i do need help. I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year, in fact our anniversary is coming up in like 2 weeks. he is super sweet and all, but it seems like hes TOO crazy about me. he is really overprotective of me,and hes three years older than me. I’m only 16. and the worst part is that my parents don’t know about our relationship. what should i do?

  • Oh yeah, I got rid of the b*****d that was bugging me. I’m free… whoohoo!

    Lilly – you’ll have to elaborate a little for people to help you. How overprotective is he, and in what way?

  • hey this isnt a tip but i have this boyfriend and we met skiing and its long distance anyhow once he went back he like called me everyday and stuff emailed me all the time and yeah then he came to visit me in the summer and yeah it was absolutley amazing but yeah it was wierd like 2 weeks after i was like talking to him and suddenly i just wasnt interested and yeah i think it was the whole fact of him want to marry me and sayin stuff like he knows im the one and he just knows that hes gonna spend forever with me and i duno like im 16 hes 17 and finally one day i was like i just wanna have fun ok i mean i want to continue this realationship and for it to work out but just cool it down abit cuz this is way too fast way too much for me to even think about so he was like ok and i was like seriously you will push me further and further away with stuff like that and he was all understanding and stuff but now hes all talking about that again and yea hes coming to visit me for a month by himself and he wants to move here and i duno like i want him to cuz that d be sweet and i duno i really do enjoy hhangin out with him and stuff and i do like him quite alot but he just keeps getting more and more serious and im like no and hes like yes and i have to keep talking to him and he haaaaaaaaaaas to call me everyday and like he called me and i was grounded and only aloud to talk to him for 15 min a day once a day type thing and he trys to call me twice a day and for longer and i duno i think im gonna have to just call it the end but i dont know how to do it hes so persistant and so in love like SO in love and i dont know wat to do.

  • I think that you need to just take it one day at a time. You first go through a sad time for a while. Don’t let that get you though. You have to have alot of will power. The second stage is well ( i feel better but not really, and your going to want to be his friend just so you know what he is doing ) Then you go through the hate stage. Oh that feels so good. Cause you look at him and wonder why you were really ever with him. What ever you do, do not jump into a relationship unless you are really ready. Trust me that does not work. You will just end up getting hurt again. When the right person comes along you will know it.

  • Not a tip just a predicament.
    I’ve been seeing my bf for a year and a half and he has a history with his ex getting a restraining order because he’s very clingy. He’s not abusive in any way, just very willing to please and super loyal. I’m very afraid his past will repeat on me. He’s 24 and I’m turning 18. He’s more immature than I am obviously. I’m trying to figure out how to ease him into a breakup. Being friends doesn’t work for him. I just don’t want him to freak out and cause problems that get him into trouble. I care alot, and feel guilty easily although I am a strong independent person and could do without a bf. I’m looking forward to dating guys in college (coming up). Any advice will probably be too general but I’ll enjoy getting some support with this problem.

  • I really need help…i beeen with my boyfriend for 4 years already and i feel like i cant do it anymore. He hurts me so many times and fooled around with other girls before on myspace and in real life and everytime i break up with him he tells me that if i leave him then he would kill himself and everytime i have to take him back..he cries and bangs his head against the wall or make his knuckles bleed..and i get scared so i take him back…i feel like im forced into this relationship..i tried everything to leave him..nothing seems to work. Now im stuck with someone that i dont see myself being with..what do i do??? can someone please tell me what i can do???….anything??..

  • hey, i’ve been in a situation like you girls. I was going out with a guy for many years, and we would break up and get back together over and over. Finally, I realized that I had enough of it, I had to stand up for myself. I changed my phone number, I deleted his emails, and I told my friends not to give out my new phone number to anybody. It was really hard, but really worth it. I didn’t answer any emails until 2 years later.

  • When all else failed I tried to get awya from him by cheating on him. of course he found out. Had I played my hand right it could have ended very easily. But my guilt ate at me and I felt obligated to stay. We got engaged in July. No escapes now!!!!!!!!!!!!! Follow -thru on whatever your plan is.

  • I was with my boyfriend for six months, and wanted to end it since day one!! i only recently told him i was a lesbian and he went running!! try it!!

  • Noooo…. bad move sweetie and I bet you know it. Unless every reason you wanted to break up with him has utterly changed and everything is miraculously perfect, I suggest you re-evaluate your situation. Engagement does not mean marriage. You are not obligated to marry him, just obligated to be committed and honest and such. Since you mentioned the past, it’s obviously still a part of the way you view things, so I urge you to be careful and take a good look at things and the changes that occur as relationships progress. Stay engaged if you want to still but wait a while. I wish you the best!

  • why is it most lads you go out with all ways cheat on you our beat u up black and blue 4 no reason i have read all of yours i know how you feel and what you are all going through no girls desurve it i wish i could help yas but im in the same boat as all of yous and it ant good when you have got children aswell when it happens when they are their it ant right take care love emma xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • Especially for sweet3xbaby–

    Ladies on some level we have all been guilt of making bad decisions for ourselves over a boy. I say boy, because all of the crazy boyfriends described here are just that–men who won’t grow up!

    In researching my issue a while back, I found this site.

    http://samvak.tripod.com/abusefamily.html

    The book is for sale, but he has also posted dozens of pages for free, just scroll down. If you take time to read through all of the pages it will really help you to understand the mind games and control techniques your abuser uses against you. You will also find ways to spot an abuser early on before you get too emotionally involved. If you are not sure if you are in danger, this site will help you spot the warning signs and make an emergency plan. The writer gives specific tips on working with the courts, police, and counseling professionals so that your integrity as a victim is maintained.

    Remember, there are many kinds of abuse and abusers are “equal opportunity” offenders. It’s not really about you, it’s about him. If he is not able to control you, he will move on to the next victim. By getting the law involved, you may really be helping him to see himself as he really is. If he is already a committed habitual abuser, you may be protecting the next victim by helping to make a record of abuse stick in the courts.

    Above all, don’t suffer your relationship in secret tell someone you trust and seek counseling for yourself so you don’t make the same bad mistakes again. Wishing everyone, including myself, a healthy normal relationship!

  • I don’t have a tip,but I really need help..Here’s my story,I went out with this guy and it was all ok for a while,but after a couple of weeks he started to get really obsessive.He called like,every 5 minutes & always wanted to me to do everything with him as if I had no life.When I said I couldn’t,he got upset.So I broke it off.Ever sense that day,he’s been calling me everyday crying trying to get me back & asking me all these stupid questions.So I really need help on how to get him off my back because it’s getting really annoying.I’ve tried talking to him many many times,but he just doesn’t get it

  • i have this problem. My ex-boyfriend raped me and now i am 3 months pregnant with this child. All i have to say is i dont want to have a baby from a 2 time sex offender. I dont know what to do. He won’t let me have an abortion. He said he will kill me if i did. He used to punch holes in my diaphram so i can get pregnant. I dont want to have this baby. what do i do?

  • This is for Trapped:

    I’m sorry to hear this, but I think it might be too late for you to have an abortion. If you can’t have an abortion the first thing to do it lose contact with him, have the baby put up for adoption. But you must first lose contact with the guy otherwise he won’t allow this. I think it might be too late for an abortion as the baby has already formed. Do you have family that can advise you and help protect you from him? You need to stay away from him and be in hiding and don’t let anyone know where you are so he doesn’t find you. If he can’t find you he won’t be able to abuse you again or even rape you again! You don’t want that to happen again! So if it’s too late to abort just give your baby up for adoption if you don’t want it, and stay safe away from him and don’t let him know your where abouts. Don’t contact him and don’t answer his calls, and change you phone #…I wish you the best and take care of yourself.

    P.S. I got rid of my b/f when I was a month pregnant and raised my daughter on my own, she will be 10yrs old soon..So I did it without a guys help and I’m sure others could too, we don’t need a guy to help out if they are going to be immature themselves. I didn’t want to have to raise 2babies so I got rid of the b/f…lol he wasn’t the father figure and more of a partier that didn’t want to take care of responsibilities !

  • try to b as pathetic liar as u could b(that he can tell that ur lying)..and let him catch u ..then give really lame excuses..
    if that doesnt work turn into a nagging wife! works like anything

    p.s.never miss an oppertunity to fight with him

  • Bring a big strong friend who can kick his a** if he does anything funky then tell him you don’t wanna be with him because(whatever the reason)and that’s it…no discussing it GOODBYE TO YOU!Better yet find a cop aquantance who can show up in uniform while the break up ensues. I’d do it in a heartbeat..especially if he is abusive. YAY! YOUR FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

  • I have no tips just a boyfriend that i want to get rid of. I am younger than him by almost seven years. Somehow we started out as friends which turn to lover. How i don’t know because i was never physically, mentally, or emotionally attracted to him. He used to take me everywhere and try to pay for everything now three months down the line i pay for everything i mean everything. He was having hard times so i let him crash with me you temporarily but he hasn’t made any plans to leave. I pay my rent, lights, water, phone, cable, buy groceries, gas, EVERYTHING. He does nothing. It didn’t bother me at first cause I am so used to taking care of my own business but once he started asking me for my money I started to feel like he was using me. He makes so much more money than me and when he has extra not once has he offered to help me pay anything or help with me little boy. Oh yea not to mention he is horrible in bed. I don’t know why I am with him. I think I just afraid to be alone I am not used to it. But this has got to stop.

  • i think the best way is to be honest.. just say ur reasons.. always have closure.. ASK ME.. plus be careful towards guyz..sometimes they are manipulative.. the first guy i got hooked up with.. he was so obbessed with dreams.. GOSH..i told him that.. and his brother.. well they are family:S..

  • I have no tips and actually I’ve had too much to drink tonight! I haven’t read too many stories above, as I am closing one eye to type this message. I’m too old and I should know the difference. I’ve been putting up with a whole lot of **** for 5 years now. He’s been to jail twice for hurting me (but should have gone many more times for hurting me). I feel extremely bad because I miss him so much when he’s gone! I don’t need him to pay my bills, I make an average income. But the part that kills me is that he didn’t have a good childhood and has never learned how to “truley” love someone and the family members that come with the territory! He doesn’t see the positive side of being part of a family. Everyone has a place, a role ro play. He doesn’t want to be part of my family (sometimes I don’t either) because they want to pry into my business and I don’t want to hear their advise–But I know they are right! NO-one likes to hear the truth. I”ve been running for five years! IT’s crazy, the more he hurts me, the further I run away. I don’t want anyone to know the horrible things he does to me especially my kids! What kind of an example to them would I be? I don’t want pity from anyone–I’ve made my bed and until I decide I deserve more and try for better-I will get exactly what I put up with-I want to start over from the time I was 16. I could have been so much more than what I am today. I’m still pretty and smart (even at my old age of 37) but I should have so much more by now. I’m smart, responsible, friendly, understanding and I know I can do anything I put my mind to. But the most important things are my two daughters that live with their dad. I suck as a parent! I’m more lucky than most people. My husband never tried to take my kids away from me–only god knows why!!! I would have probably taken everything from him if the shoes were reversed. He has his flaws–but I wouldn’t even want to compare mine to his–he’s awesome. I think I”m loosing track of this whole blog??? I really want to be alone and go back to school and try to fix what’s wrong with me………I need to get rid of this boyfriend of 6 years………I know I’ll be ok after a few months–but I have no way to keep him away from me for that long. I’m missing my life….I want it back………

  • iv been with my boyfriend 3 years now im only 20 and i live with him.i lived it when i was single goin out with my mates drinking hanging out partying but there was somethink about my boyfriend that drawed me to him but since we even got together we was arrguing, he controls me and he scares me when he gets angry throws things at me shouts at me i know what he is capable of cos he beaten up hes dad got a masheit out on a man got me into fights with other people and wev had are own fights, but then he could be the nice a pie in so confussed about my feelings some days i love him to pieces other i hate him and wish i wasnt with him. i dont wont to carry on with him and let my youths flow past and them get stuck in a rut with the relationship. is it love or not help me? many thanks x

  • im 18 i met a guy off da NET, we have been datin for 2 yrs n 7 months, hes spending 2 weeks at my house 4 christmas these last couple of days has bin **** 4 me he’s getting aggressive for the first time i really luv him but i’ve think ive had enough, im thinking about leaving him but dont knw how he has my adress and knows how to get to mine, we have a long distance releationship he lives in london, i live in manchester, far, i know. we manage to see each other alot.
    he brought his ps2 here and all he does is play it- i get no attention from him and then he expects to get sex from me when he’s ready. i feel so alone like i dont have a bf like i dont have any one. i was recently sick he comforted me, im better now so he’s back to playing his ps2.
    it will b painfull letting him go but i think its best to move on.
    is there a easy ways of breaking up with him?

  • whatever you do, do not text message breakup! even if you really want to, dont! that is cowardly and most normal human beings will not take that well. it is not nice, just say it to their face, you will feel better afterwards.

  • i lived with a boyfriend who used to play his playstation and completely ignore me even on his days off. i used to cook and clean and even walk around the house in sexy langerie so he would notice me… nothing worked so i offered we would do something and if he still egnored i would dress up and go out with friend, talk on the phone and really kept myself busy egnoring him. when i would open the door to walk out he would automatically put the game down to give me attention. so i give you the same advice… Focus on yourself egnore him don’t nag leave him alone and do something for yourself. i dont know what it is but men cannot stand when they don’t get your attention!

  • i have a little problem im struggling with… i had a really weird relationship with this guy, we did our own thing and even cheated and hooked up with other people. we fought a few times where we got abusive, he was experimenting with drugs and his moods would change causing him to get violent. a have a temper so that did not make the situation any better. I would have left him along time ago, but we truely have deep emotions for each other. we were always breaking up and getting back together, we never quite talked things out. he recentelt moved away to his hometown, and right before that we broke up. i thought it would be best to just leave him, i egnored him his birthday and even my own when he attempted to contact me. right before christmas i recieved his text saying he was not coming for the holidays.(keep in mind he has been contacting me i just never responded) he was supposed to come and visit for the holidays but instead invited me over there…and i accepted. all my friends tell me im in love with him. i always think about him and he runs through my mind all the time so i guess… shucks i am. i went had an amazing time and now im back home and im confused… But sometimes i find myself punishing myself thinking of the abuse and the cheating. i cant quite get over what happened in the past. he is really genuinely sorry for eveything he did and so am i. should i give this another chance? and how can i get over it????

  • ok so i’ve been dating this guy for 1 1/2 years and i dont feel it any more…i’ve tried to break up with him but he’s told me he’ll just kill himself…please tell me what i should do! i want to be friends with him b/c he’s fun to hang out with but i dont want to date him anymore…what do i do?!

  • where are the serious tips cuz i need some? the problem is i’m pregnant w/ this idiots baby and he’s completely seriously into me but i’m sooo not into him anymore. i know it sounds mean and i don’t want to hurt his feelings, but i went through a lot w/ hubby of 10 yrs. leaving and me rushed into this rebound relationship and figured out this guy is nice but very irresponsible? any real advice?

  • Well, believe it or not, it has taken me over two years to get rid of my ex. I broke up with him two years ago after dating him for two years. I still have him telling me that he has changed and that he wants to be with me. I also have a lot of people that I thought were my friends telling him things they find out about me. I recently received a call from him asking me if it was true that I liked some guy. The best thing to do after you break up is to stay away from him for a long time. It may be hard, but trust me it’s the best thing to do. If he insists, ask someone older that you know he respects to help you. He’ll stay away for a while. During this time you may think he is getting over you or that has been reflecting, don’t be fooled. He has not changed! No matter what, do not make the same mistakes of agreeing to being friends. That never works, especially with a jerk like him. Try to move on and evrytime he tried to go back, make sure you reject him.

  • this isnt a tip… but i want to see what you all think…… i am 21 yrs old been with my partner for over 3yrs i have to children to him that i adore and love so much. he is a 34 yr old islander who dont understnd english to the fullest but the basics enough to sit and hav a convo…. i have brocken up with him so many times i dont remember and he has pushd me around and thrown things at me when he gets mad wich is usually when he is drunk. most of our breakups result in him moving out for 2-3 days then hes back and all happy chappy recently i hav kicked him out and its been 4 weeks im so happy with my self but the thing is he comes over everyday and dnt leave till late he says sorry to me where i just want to hold him but i dont cause i try to be strong for my kids as they r old enough to know what mummy and daddy are saying. he doesn’t get the picture he wont leave me alone and i seriously don’t want him back i want to pack up and runaway to be honest but i don’t want to take the kids from him as they r our only children. he really scares me like hes going to kill himself he says stupid things and i don’t want to be put on the spot by him i am sick of him standing over me and yelling at me in front of friends lieing to my family so they take his word against mine he puts me down by calling me fat and all i think about is my stomach he makes me want to kill myself but i wont cause i care for my children to much. he recently asked if i could not be with another man and to give him a chance but how many chances does someone need. i really would like to live my own life with out him move on from him and its hard with him coming over everyday after work to see the kids because its like he hasn’t moved really he ask me if he can take us to lunch or dinner i say no and he will accuse me of keeping the kids from him, i always said to myself i will not end up like my mother and father because he really hurt her and she Neva left him but it looks like im heading that way i don’t, i was raped as a young girl Neva trusted a man and he was the first man i trusted and when we would have a disagreement he would say things about me getting rapped for example why u worry for you were rapped when you were a child i hate myself for having children to such a man and for bringing them into his presence what should i do please help me out

  • Hey, I have been with a guy for like 5 years. i am engaged to him a month ago. he really loves me, but the problem is that from 2 years till now i dont feel for him. we left for 6 months before we get engaged and i was really hapy and better off without him, but he is just too sensitive and can’t take me saying no. He treats me right but I can’t stand him, he is boring me and he is not exciting . i was 15 when i met him and everytime i tell him i don’t want to continue our relationship, he doesn’t accept to leave me and always ask for 2nd chance

  • i’ve tried to be the horrible girlfriend and it does work!!! i don’t care about my repretation with his friends, my friends know how i feel about him and that’s all that matters.

    steps:
    1. stop answering most of his phone calls. i went for day without picking them up. if he would ask you say sorry my phones been on silent.
    2. my plans with everyone else but him. if he finds out you had plans to go see a movie. tell him about, and DONT INVITE HIM. he’ll want to join but o well.
    3. if he plans something with you, tell him you are really busy with work, school, or family.
    4. if you live with him, it’s alot harder to move out b/c then you’ll have to find a place to stay and the aggravation of moving all your belongings.
    He should get the picture that you don’t have time for a boyfriend!! hopefully this helps. thanx

  • i have a problem.
    my boyfriend cares more about his car than me. I know this sounds silly but i’m serious. he’s always polishing, cleaning, and just washing it every day. he makes a schedule time to be with his car, bc he only works at night and the only time i see him is during the day. he’s unmotivated it, he hates his job, but only goes because he thinks he has too. i know if he didn’t he would be homeless and jobless living in a box. i feel that i help him financially and emotionally. i think i do way to much. we have been dating for 4 years. and he’s always had this obsession with the car. what should i do? the longer we date the longer my life drags on.

  • 1. dont ever date someone you work with …no matter what
    2. if you do, dont end up with a psycho stalker kinda guy who says he will leave you alone yet doesn’t…cry your way to the local PD and get a RESTRAINING ORDER

    3. Get a new job

    4. Refer back to # 1.

  • First off, I see that a lot of these relationships are long distance because either someone met someone online or they met on vacations and trips.

    The vacations should be realized in the beginning that it won’t work. If they don’t live near you, don’t try to plan a serious relationship. If you happen to meet up again because you vacation at the same time and you want to get together, that’s a fling and there should be no confusion about what it is. You have your own life away from there.

    Now for online.
    Why is it that we get so attached to a person that we can’t see, that we HAVE to meet them and pledge our life to them? Who are they that they should have the best part of us? I say “us” because this has happened to me as well before. In a way, it’s too emotional and that’s not healthy for anyone. My tip….don’t look to date people online. Make boundaries. Keep yourself and everyone you know safe by not letting these people so close to you. How long have you “known” the people online? I’m not trying to sound harsh, just blunt. It’s not worth it.

    The feelings and emotions are real. They are delicate and we abuse our own emotions by putting them through these tests. They weren’t meant for all of this. Look at the days before the internet was huge! People actually had to be social and upfront. No hiding. You could get real first impressions and make decisions based on that. Get off the net and get out! Meet people!

    Think before you start talking to people because believe it or not, it’s doesn’t just affect you. Whether you have children or you’re still living with your parents, it affects YOUR PEOPLE. People that you KNOW and love. It can put not only yourself, but YOUR FAMILY in danger if the person really is crazy and won’t take no for an answer.

    If you haven’t met the person face to face and you have already given your word and pledged your life ( to be engaged ) and at some point you feel inside you this thing screaming at you to stop, then listen. Don’t take it any furthur. Tell the person that you’ve thought about it and aren’t really ready for marriage. They might still want to be bf/gf though. If you don’t, be honest. Tell them that they have touched your heart, but it’s best if you just remain friends. Now, for friends. Everyone has “friends”, but not all of your friends are you bestfriends and even bestfriends have time to themselves. Don’t let others rule your life. They will take it away from you! Unintentionally maybe, but more than likely they are very selfish in nature. You have to be selfish too and think of yourself before it’s too late!

  • If you have met the person face to face, it’s a lot more difficult. There’s a lot more commitment involved to make that happen if you live far away. If you have been dating for a few months and you haven’t met face to face, BREAK IT OFF! If you have met face to face, handle it like you would had you met the in person. Sure it’s different, (because there was actually effort involved in meeting them) but if it’s wrong, it’s wrong. I had these feelings and ignored them. I was afraid to face that I was wrong. But if you have doubts now, don’t get married to them. It would only lead to a lifelong ( and probably secret ) regret that would torment you for the rest of your life.

  • In reply to lonely n desprate m for help

    The answeer is no. There isn’t an easy way. But you can do it! Take courage! You CAN do it!

  • to snazzychc724:

    If you don’t feel it it, don’t lie to yourself and make yourself stay. It’s unfair to him too if he believes that you love him and want to be together. Stop hanging out for awhile ( long while ) til you both are seeing other people, then if you still want to be friends, maybe you could all hang out. I don’t know. That could be bad cause it might spark somethng you think you want just cause you don’t have it. Sorry, I’m trying to see different ways it could go.

  • My story:
    I was 13 going on 14 (february 8th) and i met this boy, he seemed really nice and then we started dating, and i was like, wow how did i end up with him, he’s amazing. But i ended up wrong.. Inbetween September and now, we have broken up atleast 3-4 times, twice by me & twice by him. But every time he says he wants nothing more to do with me, he always comes running back, begging me to get back with him. He then always everytime gets me to say yes, and im back with him again, the very thing i told myself i wouldnt.

    So, anyway, i went to a club and met another guy, he was really nice, i got his number and it went on from there. But at the club we kinda got a bit close and kissed & danced. So the next day i decided to get my boyf to dump me. And he did. but then a week later he got me to say yes again to him. Now i wonder why i said yes. I really like this guy i met at the club and he really likes me.

    But my boyf dosnt give up easily, and is kinda stubborn. So i cant really dump him after everything. Also i would get alot of hassle of him & his foster brother (my friend) and maybe even his other foster brother.

    You probarbly thinking ‘just dumping its as easy as pie’ but really its not, its soo difficult. You would have to know him and what he’s like and you need to be in my shoes really to understand.. HELP

  • i met this guy about 3 years ago. During the time we were just ‘talking’ he had a thing with my friend and i was just devastated. He didn’t know i cared much about him, so he continued talking to this girl for a while. i would hear the things they do together or the things he did with her through other friends that i was also close to. We also hung out a lot together, but as i mentioned.. he never knew that i cared.. a lot of the times he repeated the little sweet things that he did with her to me.. and this annoyed me quite a bit. He went to boot camp a little later after .. what sucks is that my friend was not able to receive letter through her mail.. so the letters for her was addressed to my house.. and i did what i think every girl would do our of temptation.. and the things that he wrote to her caused me to hurt a bit.. but anyway.. during his 5 months of bootcamp.. i kept a journal for him that i wrote in almost everyday. and when he came back from boot camp. he found out how i felt.. and by that time he got over my friend.. We’ve continued talking since for about a few years after that had our ups and downs but he’s changed a lot for me… He always listen to what I have to say, he’s sweet, patient, and i know he cares for me a lot. He’s polite to my parents, and the only thing that’s wrong with him is that he always wants to be surrounded by my essence. it gets annoying sometimes considering the other things that i have to do aside from spending time with him.. i care for him a lot, but i feel that i cant appreciate the things that he does for me.. He’s now deployed.. and i wont see him for another year and a half. i feel that i should end the relationship; first of all because of my lack of time.. and 2ndly i dont’ think it’s fair for him to have to wait for my free time.. ergh. too much to think. school sucks.

  • to HATEhim:

    hey there,
    i kno wat u talking abt cuz i often have those kinda troubles in relationship sumtims, buh wat i think best wud b is,,

    u better kno dat new guy and try 2 think abt ur ex’s as well abt, how much do they luv u?

    wich one truly wants 2 b widd u n if he’s ready to giv u his hand forever,
    wich one cares u a lot,

    n i hop wen u found Datt,
    u’ll juzz have 2 go d; way dat u think is rgt,
    n i guarrenty u, u’ll b hapiest ever girl 2 b aliv,[no tragic trauma]

    cuz dat’s how it is,
    sumtimes we gott 2 sacrifice sumthin 2 get sum other things rgt?
    n btw;
    we can’t hav 2 bfs at a same time,, can we?XD [Winx]
    hop this’ll get u,
    n feel u much better.

    – suss.

    try mailin me if this helps u or wat u think k?
    MWah*

  • WHAT TO DO? I AM A 35 YROLDWOMAN WHO JUST GOT BACK WITH MY EX HUBBY WHO IS A COMPLETE *******. I DO LOVE HIM BUT THE YEAR WE WERE APART I WAS MAYBE NOT SO HAPPY BUT THERE WAS NO ARGUING OR FIGHTING AT ALL. PLUS WE HAVE A 10 DAUGHTER WHO WANTS BOTH PARENTS.I DONT WANT TO BE SINGLE AGAING BUT ALSO DONT WANT TO LIVE THE REST OF MY LIFE FIGHTING,THATS ALL WE DO WHEN HE IS HOME I TRY MY BEST TO STAY IN ANOTHER ROOM JUST SO I DONT HAVE TO HEAR HIS MOUTH WHAT SHLOULD I DO?

  • This 40 your old man keeps pestering me at work, at first I thought I could talk to him,
    then he tried the old trick of talking dirty to turn you on, which is one all men play.
    Another is, if you know where a girl works then you have got her right where you want her.
    He is short fat ugly stupid dyslexic and like pugsley from the Adams family.
    What more can I say, no living thing would want to mix with him. Please can any women with more spirit than me tell me what to do, I have run out of patience the sight of him makes me sick, I want to tell him to FO. I am at work and can’t, I told him I can’t spend any more time talking to him, but he did not get the message, he went and told my work colleage I fancy him. HELP!!!

  • I think the best way to do this, especially in a case like mine being a dead-beat boyfriend who smooches and practically lives with you and doesn’t leave your side, barely giving you room to breathe, requires harsher means of boyfriend elimination – the first thing you want to do is isolate yourself from this person by finding someone else or just stop talking to him. That way, he will get the hint that something is wrong and perhaps have enough backbone to leave your *** alone. If that approach doesn’t work, just tell him straight up that he needs to get a life, one that doesn’t involve you in it.

    Good luck!

  • When you start to believe a boyfriend who you haven’t seen in a long time suddenly shows up and says he is fighting a previous boyfriend of your’s I would think twice if I were you.
    You may dump one guy and remain with the other, you may try to remain friends with both guys, or you dump both. This depends on your history, their history, and whether you knew if you could trust them in the first place. If you feel you could trust both men, you may find out you are a fool. You may need to step back from both to examine your thoughts and try to remember the time in September that both tried to propose to you. There parents wouldn’t let them marry you. One had the nevre to say he would walk away from his baby for you. The other simply discussed you.
    Can you believe either of them. Is it better to start over again? Can you just work with both of them to solve the problem.
    I don’t think so.

    You may be able to work out something with one but you will never ever be safe alone with the other.

    In the end it is a private matter that no one can make guesses what will happen next.

  • I have a boyfriend i have been with for five years off and on we have a six month old baby together I love him so much but he doesnt treat me like he should he sits there and calls me names all the time i keep telling him i dont wanna be with him but he will not leave me alone hes always cheating on me. He says if im to date anyone he threatens me. So someone give me some advice please to get rid of him.

  • I’ve always been the kind of person to be friend with a guy before dating, and I decided to wait a while till i got bf cuz i dont wanna be put inthe situation of him wanting sex and wouldnt.
    So my latest boyfriend was really cool and hilarious, and since im not old enough to leave alone i live with my parents : .. so one day before me and my boyfriend wenttothe movies e decided tohang at my house and my dad was cool with him and my mom freackishly kinda obsest with him whenever he would call she would be like “hey whats goin on? how are you?” and make conversation when he was calling for me. so i later discovered he was extremely clingy and i coulnt have that so i broke up wit him. ad i thught we were done so he calls me not even a week later and tao me like nothing happened andhe still ca me and my mother still answers and asks him wat up and stuff and even though i constantly tell her “stop talkin to him! were over! let go of him!” she still does it!!! HELP!
    what should i do?!?

  • To all the women here whose boyfriends threaten to kill themselves if you leave them… Don’t buy that crap. Guys like that will say and do anything to keep you with them, and if threatening to kill themselves works, they will say just that – but in reality, they never actually kill themselves. Just say to him, “I guess you must do what you feel is right,” walk out and don’t look back. Don’t give in to any further pleading. And lo and behold, that seemingly desperate guy will still be alive the next day, the day after that, and decades more after the beakup. Please girls, don’t let yourself be manipulated like that. You’re not being cruel if you break up with them, it’s the reality of life (and do you really want to be with someone who resorts to any means to manipulate you into staying with them?). And yes, he can live just fine without you, despite his teary-eyed statements of the opposite.

    Also, as I read the comments posted here, I constantly saw uncertainty, a la “he is nasty to me, he uses me, he cheated me, but I love him and I don’t know if I should break up with him”. Yes, you do know, and yes, you should. You only have one life on this planet and this one life is a damn short one, and you don’t have to spend that life in misery. Once you see there is no future with the guy you’re currently with, break up with them. Don’t try to change them, it never works. Don’t get stuck in the “but there is true love between us!” mentality, feelings of love (whether “true” or not) don’t matter at this point. If you’re unhappy, just get the hell out and don’t be swayed by the pleading and promises that it will be “better”. I know it’s hard, I’ve been there myself. But if you manage to get through this without caving in, you’ll finally congratulate yourself. You’ll be free, there’ll be no one making your life miserable any more, and you’ll have a chance to meet someone else who you will be truly happy with.

    Seriously, ladies, we all wonder why guys treat us so badly, but it’s because we let them! Don’t put up with someone who makes you feel like crap, there is a better life out there!

  • To the 13 year old sweety at your age you should not be going through any of this abuse with a young man, He doesnt make you say yes you say yes wether you want to still be with him just a little bit or you are scared of him and what would happen if you actually was done with him, he is playing with your emotions, and believe you me i understand exactly what your saying, because i am 32 years old and it is no easier with being older to get rid of a man, i have been with mine for 6 years and told him to leave he threatens me and i am scared of him, because he has had a bad past. I dont know what to do either, i just pray that i will be ok and that he will eventually leave me alone

  • HE WONT LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I have this boyfriend and he wont leave me alone
    He wont go out and get a job
    He wont let me get one
    He wont leave my side
    I cant even go the shop without him
    He’s really paranoid
    If im not with him for more than ten minutes he thinks im with someone
    else cheating on him!!!!!!!!!!
    He doesnt trust me at all!!!!!!!
    And if he has to go somewhere when i cant go he has his friends stand outside my house waiting on me to go anywhere and they follow me everywhere……
    He’s very aggrasive he hits me if i stand up to him or if i give him back cheek
    im sick of this i cant get rid of him what should i do please help me ………………….

  • i have advice,
    if you have a new boyfriend and he is anoyying break up i hade one like that said super power are real(no they are not) and he set me on a spell i waz like yeah right then he said my hair will come off so i dump him (p.s. if your boyfriend says come to my house at night DO NOT DO IT!!!!I SAY AGAIN DO NOT GO TO HIS HOUSE AT MIDNIGHT!!!!!!!!)
    (HE WILL MURDER YOU!!!!)

  • OH AND IF YOU WANNA BREAK UP WITH HIM STAY AWAY AND HE WILL SAY”WHY ARE YOU GETTING AWAY FROM ME” RESPONDE HIMI NEED TIME ALONE HE WILL RECONIZE YOU WANNA BREAK UP WITH HIM

  • Replying to Liz who is on the first page.

    I know many guys/ppl have threatened the kill themselves when things go bad however Liz pls do not tell ppl out there to not believe those ppl.

    I am here to say in my situation u were wrong. i broke up with my boyfriend and he went into depression and his depression kept getting worse and worse. after our break up, he quit his job, went bankrupt, maxed out his credit card bills,he never was a drinker and turned into an alcoholic after our break up. he kept begging me to take him back for 5 whole months and wouldnt leave me alone. 5 months after our break up..the weekend of our 5th anniversery since we met..
    he went the lowest of low. came knocking on my door begging me to take him back or else he would kill himself and i told him to go away and that night he hanged himself and wrote me a letter saying he had to do it because of the amount of pain he was in and he couldnt live his life ithout me and he is sorry.

    Liz- there are ppl out there who ARE SERIOUS about this type of stuff. majority or them yes are bluffing but my advice is that if anyone threatens to kill themselves you should call the police and tell the police. you shouldnt let the threat affect your decision making however just to make sure incase they are serious. you need to inform someone about it. also if they are bluffing and you call the police and tell them. they are most likely to get embarrassed and wont threaten their own life again or do it again however if they are serious then this means they can get the help they need to get.

    there are warning signs like depression etc as well to look out for.

  • I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 8yrs. I’ve felt the need to get rid of him a long time ago. But every time we split up, we seem to always get back with each other after a few weeks or months. “I don’t know why”!! But all i know is that he don’t trust me and I sure in the hell don’t trust him!! We’re so mean to each other. Our relationship is so screwed up that we can’t stand to be together for more then a few hours at a time. So we live in separate homes in separate towns and see each other on the week ends. I’ve tried to date other guys, But I just find my self repulsed over the thought of dating again. I do love my boyfriend a lot but I feel that we need to move on from each other, and still I can’t!!! What is wrong with me???

  • i hav a boy frnd of 2years..i was very good in past but now he hits me n abuse me n insults me.n wenver i try to go away he forces me to b wit him.plz help me as i cnt take help of my parents….

  • i have a boy friend for 6 years now he wont work he is a big bum and a crack head who steals frome me we live together i have tried every way and any thing to get rid of him i am at apoint where i am reay to shoot him i relly fell like it when he gets on crack what else can i do

  • I kept having the same problems over and over. A guy would fall in love after only a couple of days. I got some books about addiction and co-dependence and they’ve really helped me see the signs and what to look out for. You can’t cure these men and you’re not responsible for their problems. If you can’t trust yourself to get into a healthy relationship, at least stay away from these soul-suckers. They tell you special things and talk non-stop about love, but they’re love addicts, you could be anyone.

    Hope this helps…you’re not alone =)

  • i’ve been with my boyfriend for 1 and a half year , since 5 months ago we started having problems , i wanted to broke up with him but he did abuse me and he told me that he will talk to my parents and my brother about our relationship if i didnt stay with him ;i hate him but i still with him he knows my haouse phone number he knows where i live and i’m truly afraid of him i don’t know what to do ; if he did talk to my parents it will be a big problem plz tell me what to do?!!!!

  • YOU NEED TO TALK TO YOUR PARENTS.
    NO MATTER HOW MUCH TROUBLE YOU GET IN!
    THEY LOVE YOU!
    YOU ARE BETTER THEN THAT!
    TRUST ME!
    TALK TO YOUR PARENTS…99% CHANCE THAT THEY WILL GIVE YOU AN UNEXPECTED REACTION.

    best of luck and i hpe you get to read my comment.

  • My daughter had a boyfriend 2 yrs. back. They broke up. but now my mother is in touch with him and gives him all the information abt us. He msgs her and asks hw are things, what is happening, etc.

    Please suggest me something that i can stop my mother from messaging him. Or stop him from doing so.

    My mother wont listen to us. hence need help.

  • You girls need real help. There are people who studied for 8+ years just to help people like you girls. Commenting here is going to change anything. You’ve got to seek help from a psychologist or a psychiatrist. They are doctors of the mind and they are there to help people with emotional problems. They have PhDs and everything. I really urge you to seek help. In the end no one else can change your life for you, you’ve got to take the first step.

    Good luck
    God Bless You

  • Ok!!i really need help,i’ve been wanting to break up with my boyfriend but it seems impossible,i’ve tried telling him that i’m loosing interest and so on but he’s so in love that he called me today an told me that if i break up with him he’ll come to my school and beg!!he never usually do those things i was really surprised,i’ve really changed him an its so hard to break up with him!what should i do?please give me some advice,now i’m begging,i really need it..

  • I had a bf,i had a break up with him 4 months back…bt he still call me,bt i dont pick his call, bt sometime he used to text me ,and give me warning tht if i dont talk to him he gonna tell everything to my parents .he is having my mom phone no. !!!help me

  • Please help me!

    I don’t know where to start…
    I am in relationship with the guy who is 21 years old and also i didn’t choose him to be my boyfriend.
    What he did was, he used to wait for me after school everyday, also he used to follow me force me and begged me to talk to him.
    i didn’t like him at all but i kind of start talking to him.
    also he begged for my number so i gave to him.
    but now He is trying to touch me all the time and it seem to me like he is only intresting in sex .
    i cannot get rid of him.
    another thing he knows where i live so he come to our street and keep calling me and begging me to come outside for 10 minute and see him.
    I tried to explain to him that I can be friend with you but plz don’t touch me, it seems to me he doesn’t understand the simple message.

    Also i was trying to scared him and told him that i will tell my dad if u don’t stop following me. he said that my father is in my country.
    It seems to me like he has got all the information and he doesn’t scare of no one.

    I don’t know how to get rid of him.

    I don’t have any feeling for him ,i don’t like him and also he says he loves me but i don’t belive him.
    he is not the kind of guy who will believe in love.

    He also tells me that he had a sex with his ex- girlfriends and all

    I don’t know what to do!:(:(

  • I have a boyfriend i cannot get rid of .. i have been dating him a month and i litterly have been trying my very hardest for the last two weeks to get rid of him. he calls me every 30 mintues he comes to my job and sits in my car when im on break. i have met this guy a month before we started dating, and i thought he was really cool at first and normal little did i know . he keeps repeating that he wants to be the father of my daughter from a previous relationship and keeps saying that my daughter thinks that hes the father. obviously not he gives me this guilt trip every single time i cannot spend every single minute of the day with him and tried twice to break it off but he just doesnt get it and we have not one thing in common like i love to read and he doesn’t know how to thats so mean to even say but he has no idea whats going on in the world he sits in his room and watches dragon ball z he is 21 years old !!!someone give me some advice .

  • My “boyfriend” and I have been together since 2007. We met through a mutual friend. Everything was great in the begining. I bought my first house in December and of course he moved in. I didn’t have a problem with it, until now. He doesn’t do anything!!! He doesn’t work and he doesn’t do anything around the house. I tried multiple times to get him to leave, but he’s still there. I even started talking to another guy. Leaving hints that there is someone new. He found out and now he’s friggin obsessed with me. He’s practically smothering me. He even asked if I would marry him and if we could try to have a baby. ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!!!! What do I need to do to let this freeloader know that its really OVER!!??

  • I have a boyfriend which is calling me his wife while we are not married i want to get rid of him cause he is not my life style his life is only about job and nothing romantic or go out for a walk he never asks me for something special we even can stay a whole day while he is working online not talking to each other and i am looking for fun cause am just 23 years old i wanna go out go clubbing go everywhere but since i met him everything was fine i moved to his house and i truly regret it since i moved in everything has changed in less than 5 months and now i cant rid of him cause he is doing his best to keep me at home nothing doing but watching tv i truly need help with this guy before i loose my control towards him

  • Please help me!

    I don’t know where to start…
    I am in relationship with the guy who is 21 years old and also i didn’t choose him to be my boyfriend.
    What he did was, he used to wait for me after school everyday, also he used to follow me force me and begged me to talk to him.
    i didn’t like him at all but i kind of start talking to him.
    also he begged for my number so i gave to him.
    but now He is trying to touch me all the time and it seem to me like he is only intresting in sex .
    i cannot get rid of him.
    another thing he knows where i live so he come to our street and keep calling me and begging me to come outside for 10 minute and see him.
    I tried to explain to him that I can be friend with you but plz don’t touch me, it seems to me he doesn’t understand the simple message.

    Also i was trying to scared him and told him that i will tell my dad if u don’t stop following me. he said that my father is in my country.
    It seems to me like he has got all the information and he doesn’t scare of no one.

    I don’t know how to get rid of him.

    I don’t have any feeling for him ,i don’t like him and also he says he loves me but i don’t belive him.
    he is not the kind of guy who will believe in love.

    He also tells me that he had a sex with his ex- girlfriends and all

    I don’t know what to do!:(:(

  • 11 years and I still can’t get rid of the manipulating aggressive BAST… (boyfriend). I can be impossible if you are too scared and if they have messed your head up to the point that you are a nervous wreck. Get out of the relationship ASAP as the longer it goes on the more fear and control they have on you. Gain a lot of friends and keep busy and away from him.

  • Hi
    i have a boyfried, he is a drug addict, he had tried to be clean just for me but he failed, my whole family is not happy with the relationship and he is a gangster, i cant get rid of him or be with him. he keeps coming to my place and work when i dont answer my call. he said he will not use drugs again and he needs my support and to be with him so he can be clean. he keeps emortionally blackmailing and said he will not stop using drugs if i am not with him, he wants to get married asap. how can i get rid of him as i cant leav my work or place i am living.he might even kill me cos he loves me too much. m scared

  • I bought a manual called save a breakup system and I gotta admit it helped me a lot, this manual teaches you tricks how to get your ex back, how to heal a broken heart, and how to breakup if you want to..I love it and it works great.

  • Eish i am dating some guy but only to find out that the church i just started attending does not allow me to date..What do i do coz he kinda does not undstand what I am telling him

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