You know your relationship with your significant other is on the rocks, but you still try your best to make it work. Somehow, you still hang on to a fast-fading hope that everything will turn out OK. Your relationship is on life support, and you know it. After all you went through as a couple, the least you want is something that will deal your relationship that one fatal blow that will break it all up. Not wanting to go through another argument, you let your significant other go to an all-night overnight party at a friend's place. The next day, you have that sick feeling down the very pit of your stomach, and realize that there's something wrong. For the next two weeks, you feel that your partner has become cold and distant, but he or she says that maybe you just need “a bit of space,” or “time to cool off.” A day later, a friend of yours tells you the stone-cold truth: on that fateful day, the love of your life cheated on you not just with anybody, but with a friend you thought you trusted. Cheating does not have to be that dramatic, but the pain of having a cheating partner is often indescribable. Sometimes your judgment can be so clouded by mixed emotions that you don't really know what to do. Here are some ways that can help you cope with and get rid of a cheating partner.

Signs of Cheating

Murphy's Law states, “Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, in the worst possible time at the worst possible place and in the worst possible way.” The law applies to relationships. When it comes to cheating partners, always expect the worst. Here are some tell-tale signs that your significant other is cheating on you:

• He or she is spending less time with you.
• He or she seems to be hiding a deep dark secret
• He or she doesn't want to talk about your relationship
• He or she asks for space or time to “cool off” even if your relationship is not that troubled.

Cheating is a good time to trust your gut instincts. Worse will definitely come to worst if you hear about the affair from her friends or your friends.

It's Not Your Fault

The first thing you should remember is that when you get cheated on by your partner, it's never your fault. You're the victim --- you're the one suffering from what your partner did to betray your trust. You're not doing yourself any good if you say that you are to blame for your significant other cheating on you. If you blame yourself for what happened, chances are, your partner will agree. That way, he or she can wash his or her hands off everything about the relationship, and everything that happened will be your fault. People make mistakes when they're in a romantic commitment. You may not be able to spend enough time with your partner, or that both of your priorities are a bit messed up. The blame rests solely on your partner's shoulders. No mistake in a relationship can ever be corrected or fixed with another mistake, especially something as serious as infidelity and breaking one's trust. Take the load off your shoulders. Even if it hurts, pin the blame on your partner. After all, he or she betrayed you. You should be the one who has the right to play the blame game.

Get an Explanation

Think about it --- if your partner cheats on you out of his or her own free will, then there is absolutely no way he or she could have cheated on you unconsciously. You're the victim, so you need an explanation. Here are some important things you should ask:

• How long has the affair been going on? If you've been cheated on once, there's a good chance that you've been cheated on more times and for far longer than what you think. Get the straight-up, honest answer from your partner.
• Why did your partner do it? A very convenient excuse made by cheating partners is that they were drunk, or that they didn't know what they were doing when they cheated. Drunk people may not think clearly, but they can still think. Don't take anything less than a perfectly good and rational explanation of why your partner cheated on you.
• Does your partner still have feelings for you? Cheating partners can make anyone angry, and your partner may try to appease you and appeal to your pity by saying that he or she still loves you. The fact that your partner cheated on you is proof enough that he or she has very little love for you, and betrayed your trust willingly and without second thought.

Sometimes, you don't need an explanation at all. If there is solid proof that your partner cheated on you, then you don't have to listen to him or her make excuses just to save a relationship he or she ruined in the first place.

Think Twice Before Taking Your Partner Back

Often, your partner will ask for one more chance to prove that he or she still loves you and that the whole cheating episode was “an accident.” Sometimes your judgment may be so clouded that you want to give your love one more chance. Give it a long and careful thought before you take your partner back. While people can change for the better, there's nothing more difficult to repair than love lost and trust broken. Remember that if your partner was able to cheat on you once, he or she will be able to cheat on you again. When trust is violated, it can never be repaired. Somehow your partner will have to live the rest of his or her life knowing that things between the both of you can never be the same.

Take Care of Yourself

Cheating is a very traumatic experience, especially if you've shared a long-term relationship. It's enough for some people to get depressed, and get their lives on a downward spiral. Alcoholism, drug addiction, and suicide can happen because of an unfaithful partner. Some people may even be driven to violence and crime because of the pain. Always remember to never let your heart control your head. While it's OK to down a few glasses of wine for the sake of forgetting the traumatic experience for just one night, you need to take care of your physical health and emotional well-being. There are a lot more things to live for and to look forward to than to dwell in the pain of an unfaithful partner.

Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right

Some people are tempted to get back at their unfaithful partners in the most cruel and vicious way --- by cheating back on their partner. While it may seem reasonable to do an eye for an eye, it won't do you any good to pursue a relationship just because of revenge. You need to ask yourself, “What am I trying to prove?” By cheating back on your partner, you fail to show him or her that you really got hurt because he or she violated your love, commitment, and trust. (In case you want vendetta, read the Top ten ways to get revenge on your ex-boyfriend) Karma bites back hard, but karma only works with the passage of time. There will come a time that your cheating partner will be genuinely sorry about what he or she did, and you don't need to exact revenge at the soonest possible time. When the time comes that your partner apologizes sincerely, find a place in your heart to forgive. While bitter memories are difficult to forget, you can face life with a fresh new start if you learn to forgive your partner.

Give Yourself a Chance

Maybe you love your partner so much that you can't bear to have another relationship, even if he or she did betray you. Rather than dwell on the pain of a perfect love gone wrong, let go of the relationship and move on as best you can (Why don't you try these Top 10 ways to break up). It's OK to feel hurt remembering everything, but one cheating partner doesn't have to mean the end of the world. Enjoy as much as you can from life. Sooner or later, you'll come across another person who will love you for who you are, and will remain faithful to you all the days of your life. That person is someone worth looking forward to, and worth every chance you give yourself. Think of a romantic commitment as two people carrying a fragile crystal ball. When that crystal ball is dropped and shattered, there's just no way your love for each other can be whole again. Think about it: you loved your partner at your worst, you had a relationship at each other's best, but he or she chose to break your heart. Betrayal may be painful, but it doesn't have to mean the end of life. You deserve better than a cheating partner. Don't worry --- one day, you'll find that person who will stand by you through thick and thin, through the good times and the bad, through always and forever.

 

(If you decide to leave your significant other, try these 50 mostly immature and hurtful ways to leave your lover.)