What is emotional cheating? Emotional cheating is a term that's picking up nowadays and it refers to a particular kind of cheating that doesn't involve physical intimacy with your partner and a third party.

How it Starts

Most people do not intend to start on emotional cheating until they get into the middle of it and by then they would find it difficult to back out of it.

Emotional cheating starts small, just the same way as when you start making friends. It can start anywhere--in school, in work, with an ex-boyfriend or even among his or her circle of friends. It can even start online, where anonymity and the lack of a physical presence can encourage one to pursue emotional cheating.

Wherever it started, once your partner goes out of his or her way to spend time with the third party, going to events alone with them and sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with them, then the friendship has effectively evolved into a more serious attachment. When your spouse starts thinking of another person and confiding in them more, then you are effectively dealing with emotional cheating.

Identifying Emotional Cheating

Despite the lack of the physical intimacy in emotional cheating, it can be as damaging as conventional cheating. Emotional cheating can also be quite tricky to identify. However, there are some hallmark traits that you can use when identifying emotional cheating.

1. Frequently meeting up with the so-called friend and doing activities with just the two of them.
2. Discussing hopes, dreams and fears with a third party.

3. Discussing private problems that should be kept between spouses, but instead discussed with the third party as well.
4. Being secretive about where he or she goes, keeping certain files in computer private or password-protected.
5. Putting aside quality time with his or her spouse to make time for the the third party.

These are just some ways you can identify and ascertain if your spouse is emotionally cheating with you. At the same time, look within yourself and determine on how much time you two have been spending on building and strengthening your relationship. If you think that your relationship has been lagging lately and that your spouse is displaying signs of emotional cheating, then it's time to do something about it.

Dealing with Emotional Cheating

The first thing you need to do is to stem the flow of the tide and that starts with the two people in the relationship. Here are some things that you can do to fix and improve your relationship.

1. Level off. Sit down and be honest about what's been going on between the two of you, and how much you know about your partner's emotional cheating.
2. No more cheating. Tell your partner to stop whatever it is that's going on between him or her and the third party.
3. Be honest. Convey to your partner on your hurt feelings that you experienced upon discovering his or her emotional affair. Try to find out what caused this emotional cheating to take place. Could it be that one of you had been lacking in making the relationship work? If so, what can be done to fix it?
4. Be realistic. When looking for solutions in your relationship problems, don't make promises that you know you can't keep. Tell your partner not to expect 100% trust to come back in full force, and that you will need time to cope with what has transpired.
5. Be understanding. It's understandable that you feel betrayed and cheated, but you should also try to understand what made your partner what he or she did.

6. Work on it. Work to regain back the relationship you once had. Spend quality time with the two of you, and encourage thoughts and feelings without getting into fights. It's not going to be easy, but committing yourself to your relationship means putting your back into it.
7. Forgive. To be really able to move on from the incident, you need to be able to forgive your partner completely. Otherwise, it's just a lost cause.
8. Focus on the future. Stop looking back on the past and try to move on forward. Learn what you can from mistakes made, but don't dwell on it.

Emotional cheating can be difficult to surmount once discovered, so it's also recommended for couples to undergo therapy to have their issues sorted out. As long as both parties are willing to work things through, emotional cheating can be overcome. If you enjoy reading this article, you'll surely be interested in learning how to tell if you're partner is cheating and how to build a lasting relationship.

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