Squirrels are very active, fun loving creatures. Unfortunately, their definition of fun is every person's agony. These little rascals have the ability to give Post-Partum Depression by wrecking havoc on all your belongings, around your home and EVEN on your house itself (Tips on how to get rid of postpartum depression). Whether they do this for fun or for boredom, you want to outsmart them or else!

If your grandfather clock points to 12 midnight and the lights in your home start to go “on and off”, it's less likely to be some haunting spirit sending you a message from the grave. In this modern age, it must be a squirrel munching or hanging upside down your electric cables. They might get electrocuted for doing this and your wallet will sure suffer some heavy dents as well. Imagine the bill you have to pay for for calling an electrician to fix those electric wires, which is little consolation even if you see a dead squirrel in the morning.

Many complaints about squirrels are about their great desire to “gnaw” stuff. They seem to know which stuff to “gnaw” that will annoy you the most. Of course, if you refer to all the heavy zoological books in the library, “gnawing” is the squirrels special way of remodeling their homes.

They love to create holes by chewing the fascias and sidings of your house. For them, your house is the candy house of Hansel and Gretel. The parts of your house are their favorite pickings and you would be the wicked witch who wants to get rid of them. Once these rodents create that cute hole in your house, it's their home sweet home and expect them to bring in some NESTING MATERIAL!

Squirrels are another dilemma for people who like birds. Squirrels are the number one culprit of bird feeder disturbances. They steal the bird seeds, and more often, destroy the feeder itself. If you have flower gardens and manicured lawns, lucky you. Squirrels love to dig into such gardens in search of nuts.

The worst part about a squirrel living inside your house? It reeks. Every house needs a toilet and squirrels are shameless when they have to urinate or take a dump. They can also live inside your couch which is too bad if your couch is worth a thousand dollars, upholstered in Italian silk. They are also known to carry ticks and fleas.

Know Thy Enemy

Many squirrels are very diligent in searching for nests during their breeding season which are normally mid-December, early January and early summer. They give birth from one to eight kittens and wean them within two months. Depending on the available resources, squirrels can mark their territories to as huge as 90 acres. They love to eat seeds, hard fruits, buds of elms, maples, mushrooms and garden fruits. When the abundance of food is nil, they feed on barks of trees, shrubs and sometimes even insects.

Contrary to popular belief, if you are a country mouse like Garth Brooks and Dolly Parton, squirrels are not a major headache. For urban rats like Carey Bradshaw or Eminem, squirrels are 100% irritating because they can cause significant damage whenever they manage to enter a building. They enter through unscreened vents or chimneys; they travel on television cables, electrical and telephone wires; they also jump off from nearby trees. Too bad, they're such “street surfers” of the animal kingdom.

There are many ideas here that can help your evict these furry pests. However, you won't read anything about squirrel poisoning because poisons have the awful disadvantage of leaving a rotten and putrid squirrel cadaver in your attic, around your yard and in between the walls. There are also reports of pets who get sick after eating the dead carcass of a poisoned squirrel. What you want is to get rid of squirrels without having to reach into a rotten corpse or indirectly endangering other animals in the process. Here's how to evict them safely and effectively:

“Slippery When Piped”

You have to locate how the furry rodents enter your house. If you happen to spot them running along your cables or power lines, you need to slit a 2-foot long piece of PVC pipe(those orange or blue plastic pipes) and place it over the wire where they travel. The pipe will destabilize the culprit's footing whenever they try to cross it. However, be sure to contact the power company before you execute this. They will be able to give you valuable advice on how to perform this method safely.

“Trim The Trees”

If you have a house full of redwoods, it's best to take those machetes and do some trimming. Trim the branches of your trees, particularly those close to your roof, at least 15 feet from the house. Fifteen feet is too far to jump, unless you're dealing with flying squirrels which are very rare.

“Ant-Squirrel Feeders”

Heard of squirrel proof bird feeders? These are weight sensitive bird feeders that block or close the feeding ports when a squirrel lands on it (Want to make your own bird feeder?, see how to make a birdfeeder). This will not close when a few birds land because birds are not as heavy as the squirrels. Some of these devices can even provide a slight electric shock and some even send a squirrel flying. Some of the most popular brands are Droll Yankees, Wild Bill or Brome Bird Care. It's a great investment especially if you spend hundreds of dollars worth of bird seeds. There are also feeders that spin so fast when a squirrel sets foot on it, giving the squirrel a very difficult time to harvest your bird seeds.

“Baffle the Squirrel”

Go to your local hardware store and ask for a squirrel baffle. These are devices you can affix on your bird feeders to give the squirrels a difficult time to reach the seeds. These are wonderful devices and must be used correctly for it to work. If you're going to place this on a pole, place the baffle at least five feet from the ground. Anything lower than that and the squirrel might simply jump on top of it, defeating its purpose. If you want those baffles that can be hanged, make sure you hang it at least ten feet away from the squirrel's launching pad such as tree trunks, house, fence, shed, chair, you get the idea. Some well-known squirrel buffers are Arundale, Aspects, Droll Yankees, and Eva.

“Feeder Pole Placement”

If you've been bombarded by squirrels all your life, you must know that they're magnificent jumpers. The rule of thumb is keep your eye on the sky and your feeders in the open. Some squirrels can easily jump fifteen feet (high to low) from a tree. You want the birds to feel safe feeding on your feeders, or else, setting up one won't make any sense at all.

“Sanitize”

Keeping your place clean is imperative because if there's nothing for your squirrels to sink their teeth in, then there won't be squirrels around in the first place. Get those rakes from the tool shed and rake off those fallen seeds especially those scattered by the gusts of wind. Clean the hulls from beneath the feeders and it's best if you have a “catch tray” underneath. Always empty the food trays of your pets. There is nothing more squirrels enjoy but leftovers from pet trays. They are also known to dine on basically anything they can find such as barbecue grill scrapings, bread, fruits and garbage. Yes, place a tight-fitting lid on your garbage cans.

“Seal the Deal!”

Have you looked in your attic lately? Well, aside from the possibility that it's perhaps the squirrels den during winter time, you might want to cancel a day at the salon just to seal these rodents from conquering the annexes of your house. First, check if your loft vents are still in good shape. Second, grab some wire screens (wire mesh is advisable) and seal any holes, openings, cracks that you can find. If you have a chimney, cover the opening using the same kind of wire mesh. Keep in mind that gray squirrels can fit into a hole that's as small as 1 ½ inches.

Word of caution: seal the openings but NEVER trap squirrels inside! Before any sealing executions, check if there are already squirrels living in these holes and drive them out. If you accidentally trapped a squirrel, don't provoke it by chasing it, that would make it even worse. Instead, open the doors and windows and read a newspaper. Allow the squirrel to get out by itself. If the waiting process doesn't give you the results you're hoping for, it's time to trap them.

“Trap!”

If all else fails and squirrels are literally swooning down on you like a perfect storm, it's time to resort to live trapping! There are very good trapping contraptions sold in the market such as Havarart Live Trap, among others. You can use any kind of bait but most recommend peanut butter. To be able to use peanut butter with minimal mess, spread it on a cracker before you place it in the booby trap. Once you caught the little rascals, you can start relocating them as far as you can. Squirrels have an uncanny sense of smell, relocating three blocks away from your house is not enough.

Squirrel Repellents

Squirrels misbehave all the time, putting your flowerbeds in a risky position. You can try to protect your flowers by burying an anti-squirrel fence that's at least 8-12 inches beneath the ground because these pests can also burrow like a gopher. When fencing (not the sport of course), make sure you're using hardware cloth. This method works very well with vegetable plots. However, many don't want to fence their flower gardens because admiration of blooms tends to be lessened when one is looking into a protective barrier. This is when commercial squirrel repellents come into play.

Many squirrel repellents rely on hot peppers, ground white, black and red are widely common. These can be added on bird food to deter those squirrel taste buds. Products like Shake Away and Squirrel B Gone are using predator urine to warn the squirrels and keep them away. For a squirrel who smell these products, it gives them the message “hungry fox lurking around!”. These products can either be sprayed, sprinkled or even hung around flower beds.

If you want to repel a squirrel because it's munching on your other stuff, then buy those bitter tasting gels or sprays like Ro-pel squirrel repellent. Make sure you completely read the directions carefully because many of these products need to be re-applied after a rain or after a certain amount of time. These products yield mixed results: some effective and some are not. You can always try any other products out there until you find the right formula for your furry little nemesis.

It seems that these furry little creatures are designed to destroy your peace of mind. Most of the time, you won't deal with a single squirrel, no way! There are armies of them. In North America alone, residents have a constant battle with three different species of squirrels. These are the red squirrel, the fox squirrel and the gray squirrel.

Don't be too hard on yourself when trying to get these furry animals from your house and bird feeders. You're not the only one, and squirrels make life at home a bit more exciting, especially if you see that you outsmarted a squirrel. It's really fun.

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