Everybody gets a little lonely sometimes, even if we have plenty of friends and loved ones. For some, however, the weight of loneliness can become unbearable. Some people might be lacking in social skills, lacking the time to make and maintain friendships, or simply just don’t get out enough. Any way you look at it, we all need friends and loved ones – our lives are just so much richer with them.
Alone time is good, but too much of it can have awful effects on your life. You’ll feel down about yourself, the world, and perhaps lose sleep or lose focus towards daily tasks. Going through a rut is a bad thing – going through a rut with nobody beside you is a terrible thing.
If you’re feeling like you could use some new people in your life, be they friends or intimate partners, here are a few things you can do. Who knows? You just might find a new close friend or partner for life.
1. Join a club or team.
Finding people with mutual interests is essential to building a solid friend base. If you’ve got the time for it, why not try your hand at a local sports group, gaming club, or something along those lines? You’ll be surprised at what kind of people you meet by getting out and doing what you love.
If you play sports or are interested in playing them, joining a sports team is a great way to meet new people – you’ll feel healthier, more active, and make some valuable friends on the way. There should be many amateur sports clubs in your area that are always willing to take on new members. And, if you can’t find one, why not start one yourself? Usually, all you really need is a ball and a field. Teamwork is the key to everything!
If video games, board games, or cards are more your thing, try going to your local comic book store to see if they have any social functions. Often they have tournaments and events, such as Magic: The Gathering tournaments, poker games, and video game tournaments that bring out all kinds of interesting people.
2. Party on, Wayne!
There’s nothing quite like a good rager, especially with a group of people totally awesome people. Ask your friends if and when any parties are going on, cut loose, and meet some new people. If you hit it off really well with new people, you feel better about yourself and more sociable.
People tend to remember the livelier people at a party, so you might just be a great joke or story away from people remembering your name and dying to hang out with you next time.
3. Make a better effort to meet up with friends.
It’s amazing how a friendship can fall apart because people simply fall out of touch. Sometimes there’s not even any bad blood – just poor planning, busy schedules, and countless other obstacles.
It’s not obvious all the time, but keeping a friendship really takes a lot of effort. If you feel you’re drifting away from people you like spending time with, simply ask when the best time to catch up is and it’ll be like you never left.
If you feel like you’ve got enough friends and are looking for that special someone to spend time with, try a few of these options to see what works for you.
4. Try a dating website.
The Internet has given us the ability to access just about any kind information we need and whenever we need it. Naturally, it’s also given us the ability to meet new people. There are apps and websites like Tinder, OKCupid, and many others that help people find a partner. The two biggest ones, however, are Tinder and OKCupid.
Tinder, which you use on a smartphone, is a popular casual dating app. Users swipe right on their phones to “like” another user (anonymously), and when two people like each other, they match up and are able to chat. It’s perhaps the most popular dating app on the web due to its casual and anonymous nature.
OKCupid is more in-depth than Tinder, as you can fill out a detailed profile, see who views your profile, and play a kind of question game that allows you to see how well you may match with someone. OKCupid is a more formally social media-oriented dating website, but it helps to get a feel for somebody before you meet them in real life.
More people are using dating websites and apps than ever before, so why not give it a shot? You never know who you’ll meet and where it will go until you try.
5. Ask your friends.
There’s no shame in asking if somebody you’re interested in is seeing anyone or not. If you are interested in a friend of a friend, or a friend of a family member, simply ask them if they are available.
We all need to be more open about our feelings and attractions sometimes, and this is one of those cases. Besides, isn’t that what friends are for?
6. Come up with clever (not creepy) ways to give out your number.
Sometimes it’s an act of stone cold confidence to give out your number to someone. It can be a nerve-racking thing to muster up the courage for, so why not try a creative way to go about it? For example, do something like this: you notice a group of people playing pool in a bar – you go up to one of them and say “Game of pool for your number?” It’s a fun, relaxed, and memorable way to start a possible dating story.
Just don’t be creepy. Sure, it’s a fine line sometimes, but you should be able to tell if you’re acting creepy or not.
With so many interesting people around, meeting others is really exciting if you make it out to be. Loneliness becomes habitual if you stay isolated for too long, and can actually have serious mental and physical health effects in the long run. We need our alone time for sure, but too much of it really is a bad thing. Turn that negative energy into something more constructive and go meet some new people!