Posted on: March 22, 2009 Posted by: Nicole Harding Comments: 2

Confidence and being comfortable in your own skin is sometimes difficult to accomplish when we are busy comparing our lives with the lives of other people. A false self-image of perfection can lead to low self esteem and poor self confidence. Read on to find out how you can get rid of low self-esteem and replace it with confidence.

There are certain things that can contribute to low self esteem that include, but are not limited to: life stressors, disapproving authority figures, bullying that takes place in school, the work force, or tension between friends and family. Academic challenges, trauma, your belief system, society, and the media can all play a role in causing low self esteem as well. So what can you do next?

1. Stop comparing yourself to others.

It is very easy to fall into the habit of comparing yourself to others to see how you measure up. However, what we fail to realize is that we are often comparing what might be the beginning of a particular “journey in life” to the middle of someone else’s particular journey.

Instead of comparing yourself to others, why not compare yourself to only yourself? Raise the bar on your own goals and focus on how to improve yourself.

2. Focus on the positives.

When assessing our own lives, we concentrate mostly on the negative things in life or how we are not where we want to be instead of focusing on the positive things in life.

Rather than replaying the mistakes that you have made in life over and over again in your head, try complimenting yourself. It is very easy to let certain thoughts consume your mind, so try and quiet the voice that makes us our own worst critics. Start small with your compliments and allow yourself to appreciate your achievements no matter how small or big the accomplishments may be.

3. Write it down.

Take some time to sit down and write up a list of things that are going well in your life, or some of the accomplishments and achievements that you are proud of so far in life. Whenever your self esteem is on the lower side, take this list out and read it to remind yourself how far you have come. Use this as a reminder that you can come far in life and there are many things to be proud of in life.

Invest in a small journal that you can easily carry around with you along with a pen so that whenever something positive happens in life, you can record this down. By doing this, you are training your mind to focus more on the positives and pay attention to the compliments you receive rather than listening to the critical or negative thoughts in your head.

Squash negative thoughts that often get worse when you are mulling over them in your mind, and replace them with positive feelings instead.

4. Don’t underestimate or undervalue your accomplishments.

Recognize your achievements and accomplishments in life will boost your self esteem. Don’t pass them off as something that others can easily achieve, since everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses.

Nobody is good at everything. Take control of reaching your goals and be proud of what you have set out to attain. Go and GET IT!

5. Stay active whenever possible.

When you are on the move, it is best time to focus on yourself and connect with your body. You need your mind and body to be in good shape in order to perform at your optimal level.

Not only is maintaining an active lifestyle healthy, it also provides your body with chemicals called endorphins. These are chemical reactions that get released into your system that makes you feel good. Take advantage of this opportunity to feel amazing, boost your confidence, and clear your mind of negative worrying thoughts.

6. Live in the present and not in the future.

In today’s society, we are often so busy thinking ahead or planning ahead that we forget to live in the present moment. We essentially forget about living and how to cherish the memories that we are making along the way while we reach our life goals.

Don’t plan future aspects of your life that you cannot have any control over. Instead, focus on aspects of your life that you can control, and adjust to meet your requirements when it comes to reaching your goals.

As the saying goes, stop and smell the roses! Taking time out of your life to just appreciate the finer things in life will allow you to put a lot of things into perspective.

7. Surround yourself with positive and supportive people.

Having people that support you and keep your best interest at heart is incredibly important. Don’t be afraid to say goodbye to people who are only holding you back in life or holds nothing but a negative outlook on life. True friends stick around for the good and the bad, so don’t be afraid to talk to people whom you trust about what problems you might be going through.

8. Take some time to appreciate yourself.

Take some time out of your day to pamper yourself and treat yourself to something nice, whether it is booking yourself for a full on spa day, to a mini spa, to a golf session, or whatever fits your fancy.

Setting time aside to take care of your body will allow your mind to connect to your body’s physical well being. Set a little time aside to thank yourself for the smaller things in life, such as the ability to wake up to a brand new day with endless possibilities to make a difference in the world, to ability to breathe, to eat, to rest in a comfortable bed, and living life in general.

Consciously working towards a positive mind frame and learning to change the inner voice to a positive one is more difficult to achieve than you’d imagine. All of these options to boost your self esteem will take time and patience. Changing your outlook on life to become a more positive individual will take a lot of practice.

Once you start getting into the hang of looking at the bright side, things will come to you easier because the more you are aware of contributing factors to your low self-esteem, the better you are able to handle it.

One thing to keep in mind is that, “you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” – A.A. Milne.

2 People reacted on this

  1. As someone with low self esteem, some parts of the first page are pretty offensive to me. Sometimes I feel like the article portrays people with low self esteem as jealous diseases. The article does get a lot better after that though.

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